Monday, May 21, 2007

TV: The King of Queens - 3rd Season

DVD: 3 Discs
The King of Queens - The Complete Third Season

"Hi, I'm Doug. I'm a Pisces. I like walks in the rain and bags of pork rinds."

Review: This is the season where IPS goes on strike and Deacon & Kelly separate, which led to some great episodes.

"He's your boss. This is the perfect chance for you to get some brownie points, you know, stand out from the pack a little bit."
"All right, now I see how we got off track here. See, you want me to stand out from the pack where as I want to remain hidden and obscured by that very same pack. Carrie, it's how I survive, all right. Staying nameless and faceless. Not too good, not too bad, right on the cutting edge of mediocre."

"I'm going to join a gym and start a diet and whip this body into shape because no one is calling me, Fatty McButterpants, anymore."
"Someone called you, Fatty McButterpants?"
"On line at the bank yesterday, yeah."
"And it took seeing the Big & Tall Bag to push you over the edge?"

"Okay, Honey, you're all set. Here's the Speak-and-Say, his binkies, wipes, talc, diapers and butt cream."
"Butt cream? Where's this day heading?"
"Yeah, you wish."
"Like I'd waste a wish on that, huh?"

"Whoaah!!"
"Hello."
"Dad, you can't just come up here! I'm in my bra!"
"Settle down. I've seen better."

"Hey, you know what. I just figured out what I want for dinner. A nice, hot bowl of SHUT IT STEW!"

"Hey. How come you never greet me at the door, naked, like the other wives?"
"What other wives?"
"You know, you read about them."
"I'll get on that."

"Go ahead, man. Pull the trigger. But if you shoot me, Kelly shoots you."
"Yeah, but if Kelly shoots me, Carrie shoots Kellie."
"Then I shoot Carrie."
"Doug, you shoot me and you're never getting sex again!"
"YOU CAN'T DO THAT!!"
"Oh, it's done."

"You've got to be naked to cheat."
"Wrong!!"
"Carrie, so you're telling me, if I met a women and we went out for a dinner or two and then, say I forgot to tell you about it, right? I'd be cheating?"
"YES!"
"Really? And that would be just as bad as if I actually slept with her?"
"YES!"
"Good to know."

4 out of 4 Stars

No comments: