Film: Zoolander (2001)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"I guess the look I'm best known for is Blue Steel. And then there's Ferrari and Le Tigre. Le Tigre's a lot softer. It's a little bit more of a catalog look."

Review: This is a spoof movie of the fashion industry with great lines and lots of funny cameos. Ben Stiller plays a top male model who is brain-washed in an attempt to kill the new leader of Malaysia who wants to eliminate child labor.

"It's that damn Hansel! He's so hot right now!"

"Did you ever think that maybe there's more to life than being really, really, really, ridiculously good looking?"

"I think Katinka wants to kill you."
"Good! I deserve to die if I can't even beat Han-suck-ass in a walk off."
"Derek, that's not true. The guy had to miraculously pull his underwear out of his butt just to beat you."
"And all he had to do was turn left."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: You Don't Mess with the Zohan (2008)

DVD: Anamorphic


"I never worked at a pretzel stand. You like to insult people?"
"Was that your feet?"
"Yes, it's the feet. The feet uppercut... Here comes the double foot. This is good. Smell it, smell it, smell it. Now take it. That's for you."
"Aaaah! All right, let me go!!"

Review: I was very surprised. I loved this movie as much as I normally hate Adam Sandler movies. I think it is because of the help from Judd Apatow and Robert Smigel in writing the script. Also, Adam Sandler really became Zohan, an Israeli super soldier who moves to New York to become a hairdresser, instead of playing just another version of himself like in most of his movies.

"She has a free shoulder. Come join."
"I'm good."
"Mrs. Haynes, you're getting cold here. Claude, come. Keep her warm. Go ahead. Yes. And gently move. Gently move the shoulder. All you want to do is let her know you're here for her. Now look away like you're not even doing it. We're not doing this... Same rhythm."
"Okay."
"Push. Push. Push. Oh, you're pushing harder. It's starting to feel good on my end."

"Get out of here, Ahab, or I'll cut your eyes out."
"What you cut my eyes out with?"
"My blade, camel jockey."
"My friend, the beating I give you if you stop the spraying is much less than the beating I give you if you try to cut me."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Dances with Wolves (1990)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9 - Double-Sided


"You wish to see the frontier?"
"Yes sir, before it's gone."

Review: This is an amazing movie that shows the last years of the Sioux Indians before they were moved onto reservations. The film follows a Civil War soldier who finds himself posted to an isolated and abandoned army fort far out in the prairie where he comes in contact with a nearby tribe. Graham Greene is great as Kicking Bird, the medicine man who befriends the soldier.

"I am in agreement with Kicking Bird. We will go down and talk to the white man. And find out why he is here."
"If this council decides to talk to the white man then it will be so. But in my mind, it's not right that a chief as great as Ten Bears goes to ask the business of a puny, trespassing white man who has only a smart horse and a few white man's clothes."
"I will not go. You will go. And you will go. That is all I have to say."

"Dances With Wolves! I am Wind In His Hair! Do you see that I am your friend? Can you see that you will always be my friend?"

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Amistad (1997)

DVD: Anamorphic


"Well when I was an attorney, a long time ago, young man, I err... I realized after much trial and error, that in the courtroom, whoever tells the best story wins. In unlawyer-like fashion, I give you that scrap of wisdom free of charge."

Review: I always like well-made courtroom dramas and this one goes all the way up to the Supreme Court. A group of African slaves revolt and take over their slave ship but are soon captured by the American Navy. At a unique time when slavery was still legal in America but the transport of new slaves across the Atlantic was not, they were able to win their freedom in court.

"If only we could corroborate Cinque's story somehow with evidence of some kind."
"The inventory. If you look, there's a notation made on May tenth, correcting the number of slaves on board, reducing their number by fifty."
"What does that mean?"
"Well, if you look at it in conjunction with Cinque's testimony, I would say that it means this: The Tecora crew have greatly underestimated the amount of provisions required for their journey, and solved the problem by throwing fifty people overboard."

4 out of 5 Stars