TV: Wings - 5th Season

DVD: 4 Discs


"Joe, when did you become such a prude? It seems I remember back when we were dating, someone got a little frisky at the Museum of Fine Arts."
"We never went to the museum."
"Oh well, you know... You missed a great exhibition."

Review: This is the season that Helen is in a long distance relationship with Davis and Brian and Alex are together. A lot of good episodes but the best is when Joe can't take the pressure any more and flees for the tropics.

"Hey listen, when it comes to matters of the flesh, do what I do. I say...."
"Oh my Lord, he's going to tell us."
"...I say a real man never loses an opportunity. That's why I always have 'Cold Duck' in the refrigerator and a fresh tape in the camcorder."
"Hey, does anyone ever go out with you twice?"
"It doesn't matter. That's why I got the camcorder."

"I was running... my socks fell down... I went to pull them up... fell on my tailbone."
"Precisely why I run in the nude. There's nothing like feeling the wind blow through... Well, pretty much everything you got."

"Nauseous, huh? That never happens to me. I can eat just about anything. Well, that's not true. There's one thing I can't stomach. It's when you take a bite of chicken and a big ol vein comes snapping back at ya."
"This is Lowell Mather, our chief mechanic."
"Charmed."

"Alex is really mad at me."
"Does the whole world have to revolve around your love life?"
"Wouldn't it be a magical place?"

"Wait a minute, wait a minute. We've waited this long. We should make our first time really special."
"Let's make our second time really special. Let's make our first time really soon."

"My instructor promised that the mouse would only be used for a few harmless experiments, but he lied."
"Ah, they always lie. First, they suck you in with milk and cookies. Next thing you know, you're running naked through a maze."

"Helen's a little upset because Lynch bought her this flimsy black lace teddy."
"I'm not going to sleep in it."
"You're not supposed to sleep in it. You put it on, do a half-gainer off the headboard and throw it in the corner till morning."

"You're a pilot, huh?"
"Yeah, that's right."
"It must be pretty romantic. I mean, the glamour, the risk, the freedom of the open sky. Oh my God! How lame? The freedom of the open sky."
"No, no, actually, it's not lame at all. Flying your own plane is pretty glamorous."
"Joe, we're running low on barf bags."

"Brian, I would love to go out with Courtney, BUT 19! Wouldn't people talk?"
"Hey Joe, you're a good looking guy in his thirties without a girlfriend. Trust me, people are already talking."

"They want us to go to a party, down at the beach."
"Ooh! You know what, maybe I better just go home to Alex."
"Oh, poor Brian. We understand. It's okay. Hey, wait a minute, you got a little something sticking out of your collar. Oh look, it's a leash."
"Hey! I know what your trying to do, man. You're trying to embarrass me into going out with ya. Let me tell you something... it worked! Let's go!"

"I can't believe Brian, he actually went."
"And after you told him in no uncertain terms that he could."
"Exactly. Why can't men understand that go means stay?"

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

TV: Wings - 4th Season

DVD: 4 Discs


"No lie, Antonio. We were forced to make a water landing."
"We spent eight hours at sea."
"Freezing cold in a lifeboat."
"...with Roy."
"Oh God! You poor people."

Review: This is another good season of Wings that introduces the character of Alex, the female helicopter pilot that Brian and Joe compete over for most of the season. "Blackout Biggins" and "It's So Nice to Have a Mather Around the House" are a couple of my favorite episodes.

"Look, I've found the perfect nose, page 7. The Mitch Gaylord."
"Who?"
"Mitch Gaylord, the Olympic Gymnast. He won the gold in '84."
"Ah, I remember him. He's very muscular, very graceful, very... Excuse me, I've got to go pick up a copy of something with naked women."

"Roy, you old dog, you finally got her. Helen, I'm more than a little disappointed in you."

"When I'm here. When I'm at the gym. I'm in a zone. It's just me, my machine and my muscle group. You know?"
"Slick..."
"Excuse me. I'm trying to focus, okay? Aargh!"
"When you're through focusing, you might want to turn around because you're in that thing backwards."

"Brian, look what I found in your room this morning. Didn't anyone ever teach you where dirty dishes go?"
"Well, Lowell, I like to eat a sandwich in bed while I watch TV. Some times I raise the degree of difficulty and bring in a woman."

"Wait, you've been arrested?"
"Well, I'm not proud of it. It was during an Anti-War Rally in San Francisco in 1966."
"What, you never said you were a protester."
"Well, I wasn't. I was a shopper. I bumped into Abbie Hoffman coming out of Gump's. He called me a fascist pig and I decked him. It took me a week to get the smell of marijuana off my knuckles."

"I would rather be alone, then be with that loser we met tonight."
"What was that on his head? A toupee or a piece of sod?"
"I want that guy's mirror. You know, the one that talks back to him and says, "Hey, Lookin Good!'"

"First, we flew to Maine and we found the most incredible place for lobster. Then after dinner, we just stumbled across this funky little miniature golf course. Then on the way back to the plane, you won't believe what we found leaning against this old oak tree."
"A tandem bicycle."
"Wow, how did you know?"
"Congratulations! You just went on Brian Hacket's Date Package Number Seven."
"What?"
"Yeah, it just one of those spontaneous little evenings he spent years perfecting."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

TV: Wings - 3rd Season

DVD: 4 Discs


"How could Helen do this to me? How could she just drive her Jeep through my office?"
"Uh, let's see. You ask her to come back to Nantucket. You lead her to believe that you're still in love with her and then she finds out you are involved with another women. Let's see if we can piece this mystery together."
"Does that justify her destroying my private property?"
"No, but I salute her sense of whimsy."

Review: The 3rd season started off great with Joe's office being destroyed three times and ended with a good cliff-hanger. Some of my favorite Wings episodes are from this year. This is the season where Antonio the cabdriver became a main character on the show.

"What's the world coming to? Listen to this. It says here 15% of the American public would rather watch television than have sex."
"15%, yeah, I'd buy that, yeah. You know, maybe you're too tired or she's too... Uh, what's a nice way to put this? Ugly."
"The words, 'Too Tired, are not in my vocabulary and frankly, Roy, I don't think the words, 'Too Ugly' should be in yours."

"Give me that, Hackett. I'll be your delivery boy."
"Do you know what to do?"
"Oh sure, I served a subpoena to my mother once."
"You sued your own mother?"
"I just served her. Dad made me. See, the trick with these things is to surprise the subpoenee. Not let them see what's coming. Observe... Here you go!"
"What's this?"
"It's a subpoena, Toots. You can consider yourself served."

"Okay, okay, okay! Oh, Helen, I'm so ashamed. I can't even look you in the eye."
"Well try, Roy, because right now you are looking at my breasts."

"I'm very pleased to meet you, Brian with an I. You know, my friends have accused me of forgetting how to laugh. You'll have to teach me again."
"Ok, but it may involve feathers and some nudity."
"Yes, it may at that."

"Alright look. Guys, if we really want to get Joe here, there's no way he's going to fall for just any run-of-the-mill story. This calls for a masterpiece of BS. I am going to go inside that office, pull on my hip waders, and shovel myself a Mona Lisa."

"What the hell was that?"
"I don't know. I don't know. One minute we're spanking each other with meat, the next minute it got weird."

"I haven't had a date in forever."
"None of us have. It's been six month's since I've been on a date and that was with a total moron... Oh, stop counting, Joe. It wasn't you. When I dated you, I was the moron."

"Joe, I know you're only trying to help, but I think you really stirred up a hornet's nest here."
"Who said I'm trying to help?"
"All of a sudden I'm proud to be a Hackett."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

TV: Wings - 1st & 2nd Seasons

DVD: 4 Discs


"May I please have your attention. We regret to inform you that Sandpiper Air, Fight 14 to Boston, has been further delayed due to mechanical difficulties."
"Aaaah, no!"
"But on the bright side, freedom and democracy have broken out in Eastern Europe."

Review: This is a low-key workplace comedy that I enjoy watching. All the characters are well played and funny, but I think Steven Webber is the best as Brian.

"You are going to an awful lot of trouble. Do you really want to date with her that badly?"
"Joe, I'm used to having women either loving me or hating me and this bizarre middle ground of adult mature friendship just makes my skin crawl."

"Fay, I have to admit. I'm a little nervous about having my fortune read."
"Oh, Lowell, relax. It's just good-natured fun. There's nothing to worry about.... OH, TORTURED SOULS OF ETERNAL DARKNESS, OPEN MY EYES THAT I MIGHT SEE... Aaah!"
"WHAT?"
"It's the card of good fortune."
"Oh God, I knew it."

"She says I have 42 parking tickets, Brian."
"Consider your self lucky, Joe. It would have been 43, but I drove off while they were writing one of them."
"Hey Sugarbuns, move it along."
"Sugarbuns? Uh, isn't that cute, Joe? She's already given you a prison nickname. One I suggest you change, by the way."

"See, this is our problem, Joe. You care more about this stupid plane than you do about me."
"ME, you are the one with the Cello between her legs eight hours a day."
"Well at least that gives me some satisfaction."
"Yeah, well at least when I'm in the plane I get some sense of movement."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

TV: Walt Disney: The Chronological Donald - Volume 1

DVD: 2 Discs


"Hey, what's the big idea!"

"So! You want to get tough, huh? You doggone contraption. I can't understand what makes it so doggone obstinate."

Review: "Modern Inventions" had me laughing so hard that I cried, but the others haven't that big of an impact on me. They just aren't as funny as Looney Toons. I still need to watch all of them though.

"Welcome, sir"
"Ah! Who are you?"
"I'm the robot butler, sir."
"Oh yeah. So what?"
"Your hat, sir."
"Hey! Let go of my hat!"
"YOUR HAT, SIR!"
"I get you for this."
"Thank you, sir."
"A fine way to act. Why don't you pick on someone your own size? You big goon."

"Waak! The very idea! Getting into my food. Scram! Hey! You doggone pest! Waak! I'll get you, you doggone pest! I'll assassinate you! I'll tear you apart, you chipmunk! Waak! Come on, you little rat. I got you! I got you! Come on! Come on! Huh! My, what big ears. Such big teeth. My goodness. And what a big mouth you have for such a little animal."

"Ha ha ha ha! Do you call that hockey? You're supposed to put this in the net."
"What do you know about hockey?"
"Who, me? Feast your eyes on this. Hockey Champion of Duck Swamp."
"Aw, phooey!"
"I see that a demonstration is in order so I'll beat the three of you all by myself."

"We'll save you, Uncle Donald! Jump, Uncle Donald!"

4 out of 5 Stars

TV: Wallace & Gromit in Three Amazing Adventures

DVD: 1 Disc


"Cracking toast, Gromit!"

Review: Excellent British comedy, these award-winning shorts are amazing to watch and full of laughs at the same time.

"It's the wrong trousers, Gromit, and they've gone wrong!"

"Yer dog's waiting."
"Aye, I'd better see to him. The bounce has gone from his bungee."

"No cheese, Gromit! Not a bit in the house!"

5 out of 5 Stars