Film: Wonder Boys (2000)

 DVD: Enhanced for 16:9

Review: This well-written movie takes place over a wintery weekend in Pittsburgh as an English professor, played by Michael Douglas, struggles to finish his second novel while dealing with the end of his marriage, his girlfriend's pregnancy and a suicidal student. Robert Downey Jr. is great as his New York editor who arrives to check on the progress of his novel.

Quotes:
"Why did you keep writing this book if you didn't even know what it was about?"
"I couldn't stop."

"Shit, James. You shot Dr. Gaskell's dog."
"I had to! Didn't I?"
"Couldn't you have just pulled him off me?"

"I wish you hadn't shot my girlfriend's dog. Even though Poe and I weren't exactly what you'd call simpatico, that's no reason he should've taken two in the chest."

"So there it was. Somewhere in the night, a Manhattan book editor was prowling the streets of Pittsburgh; best-selling author at his side, dead dog in his trunk."

"Grady, you know how in class you're always telling us that writers make choices?"
"Yeah."
"And even though you're book is really beautiful, I mean, amazingly beautiful, it's... it's at times... it's... very detailed. You know, with the genealogies of everyone's horses, and the dental records, and so on. And... I could be wrong, but it sort of reads in places like you didn't make any choices. At all. And I was just wondering if it might not be different if... if when you wrote you weren't always... under the influence."
"Well... thank you for the thought, but shocking as it may sound, I am not the first writer to sip a little weed. Furthermore, it might surprise you to know that one book I wrote, as you say, 'under the influence,' just happened to win a little something called the Pen Award. Which, by the way, I accepted under the influence."

"Naturally you have copies."
"I have an alternate version of the first chapter."

"You didn't happen to call our house last night, did you?"
"I think I might have, yes."
"What do you think you might have said?"
"I think I might have said I was in love with you... He told you?"
"He told me."
"And what did you say?"
"I said it didn't sound like you."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Watchmen (2009)

Blu-ray


Review: This film takes place in 1985 on the eve of nuclear war as a masked vigilante, Rorschach, investigates the death of The Comedian, a former teammate from the disbanded Watchmen crime-fighting group. The opening credits sequence of moving photographs beautifully sets up the back-story of the Watchmen & the alternate history of the USA populated by superheros and villains. This film improved for me upon a second viewing. While I appreciated the craft and the storytelling the first time, I had missed a lot of the details because I had never read the original comic.

Quotes:
"Is this bean juice?"
"Human bean juice. Badge belonged to The Comedian. Blood too. He's dead."

"Meeting with Dreiberg left bad taste in mouth. A flabby failure who sits whimpering in his basement. Why are so few of us left active, healthy and without personality disorders? The first Nite Owl runs an auto-repair shop. The first Silk Spectre is a bloated, aging whore dying in a California rest resort. Dollar Bill got his cape stuck in a revolving door where he got gunned down. Silhouette, murdered, a victim of her own indecent lifestyle. Mothman's in an asylum in Maine. Even Adrian Veidt, possible homosexual. Must investigate further."

"Do you remember that crazy guy? What did he call himself... Captain Carnage. The one who used to pretend he was a supervillain just so he could get beaten up all the time?"
"Yeah, he tried that on me once. I just walked away. He starts following me down the street in broad daylight, yelling 'Punish me! Punish me!' I'm just saying 'No! Get lost.'"
"God. Whatever happened to him?"
"Well, he pulled that on Rorschach, and Rorschach dropped him down an elevator shaft."

"It's a joke. It's all a fucking joke. You know, I thought I knew how it was. I thought I knew how the world was. I've done some bad things. I did bad things to women. I shot kids. In 'Nam, you know. But that was fucking WAR! This... I never done anything like this. God, here I am... spilling my guts to one of my archenemies. But the truth is, you're the closest thing to a friend I got. What the fuck does that say? Shit!"

"Maybe we should get a cab. These are bad neighborhoods."
"Yeah, well, I'm in a bad mood."

"None of you seem to understand. I'm not locked in here with you. You're locked in here with ME!"

"Dan? Is everything alright?"
"God I'm tired of being afraid, afraid of war, afraid of the mask-killer... and afraid of this goddamn suit, and how much I need it."
"Me too. So to hell with it; let's take Archi out."
"You're serious."
"I used to be a masked avenger too, you know; I'm used to getting up at 3 in the morning and doing something stupid."

"John, please. You have to stop this. Everyone will die!"
"And the universe will not even notice. In my opinion, the existence of life is a highly overrated phenomenon. Just look around you. Mars gets along perfectly well without so much as a microorganism."

"So in order to save this planet... I had to trick it with the the greatest practical joke in human history."
"Killing millions!"
"To save billions. A necessary crime."
"You know we can't let you do that."
"'Do that', Rorschach? I'm not a comic book villain. Do you seriously think I'd explain my masterstroke to you if there was even the slightest possibility you could effect the outcome. I triggered it 35 minutes ago."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: The Wrestler (2008)

Blu-Ray


Review: An amazing character study that gave me a whole new respect for wrestling and Mickey Rourke. Randy "The Ram" is an aging broken-down wrestler still holding onto his glory days from the 1980s as he continues to fight in the ring twenty years later. Marisa Tomei is excellent as an older stripper that he forms a bond with and who is entering the twilight of her career as well. The intense scene of Randy getting patched up in the locker room after his brutal match with the Necro Butcher is a graphic display of the mental and physical toll of his profession after the adrenaline high from the crowd has dissipated.

Quotes:
"As for as tonight, I don't know what you wanna do. I had a few ideas. I was thinking, you know, maybe just for the heat, I would give you a low blow, follow it up with a bulldog."
"Just bring the cheap heat, bro."
--------
"Maybe make your comeback right off there."
"Bang off the ropes, then super kick and, uh, Ram Jam, and then we go have a beer, okay?"
"That sounds great, man."
"You hang in there. You got a lot of ability."
"All right."
"Okay?"
"Thank you."
"Bless you."

"Oh, Jesus. You're bleeding. Oh!"
"Yeah, I got cut tonight."
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, it's nothing."
"They say wrestling's fake."
"Look at this. 1986, Denver Coliseum, Billy Bob Banjo hit me with a two-by-four. It had a loose nail in it, split my bicep right in the hell open. Look at that. I got a better one than that. Take a look at this here. 1988, okay? Orlando Civic Center. Mr. Magnificent threw me over the top ropes. I landed on my shoulder and cracked my clavicle right in half."
"Oh, my God. Does it hurt?"
"Well, it hurts when I breath, but, I mean, you know, you hear the roar of the crowd, you just motor through, you know?"

"Yeah! Goddamn, they don't make 'em like they used to."
"Fuckin' '80s, man. Best shit ever."
"Bet your ass, man. Gun N' Roses fuckin' rules."
"Crüe, Def Lep."
"Then that Cobain pussy had to come around and ruin it all, you know."
"Like there's something wrong with wanting to have a good time."
"I tell you something. I hated the fuckin' '90s."
"Nineties fuckin' sucked."

"I use to try and forget about you. I used to try to pretend that... you did not exist. But I can't. You're my girl. You're my little... You're my little girl. And now... I'm an old, broken-down piece of meat. And I'm alone. And I deserve to be all alone... I just don't want you to hate me... Okay?"

"I'm doing my thing. I'm going to work."
"Yeah, but... but your heart."
"My heart? My heart's still tickin'"
"Yeah, but the doctor said..."
"Listen, I know what I'm doing. And, you know, the only place I get hurt is out there. The world doesn't give a shit about me."
"I'm here. I'm really here. What do you call that?"
"Hey! You hear them? This is where I belong. I gotta go."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: Zombieland (2009)

DVD: Anamorphic


Review: Hilarious zombie road trip movie! I love Woody Harrelson in these type of roles. The slow motion opening credit sequence backed by Metallica's "For Whom the Bell Tolls" set up the movie perfectly. The survival rules concept popping up throughout the movie was a nice touch.

Quotes:
"Why am I alive when everyone around me has turned to meat? It's because of my list of rules. Rule number one for surviving Zombieland: Cardio. When the virus struck, for obvious reasons, the first ones to go were the fatties. Poor fat bastard."

"So, Tallahassee, you wanna stick together. Least for a while?"
"Here's the deal, Columbus. Ah, I'm not easy to get along with and I'm sensing you're a bit of a bitch so, ah, I give this relationship to about Texarkana."
"Really?! Yeah! You'll take me as far as Texarkana?"
"You're a peppy little spit-fuck, aren't you?"

"I haven't cried like that since Titanic."

"Oh, it's a '97"
"Yeah. Was that a good year?"
"Oh my God! It was a great year! Are you kidding me? I saw my first R-rated movie that year. Yeah, Anaconda."
"Ah, Anaconda."
"First tattoo, porpoise."
"Really?"
"Fake. First kiss... Scotty Lynch."
"You guys... used tongue?"
"Maybe. You jealous of Scotty Lynch?
"Yes, I am. Actually, I think I'm jealous of your whole 1997."

"My mamma always told me someday I'd be good at something. Who'd have guessed the something would be zombie killing?"
"Probably nobody."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Very Bad Things (1998)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"If you take away the horror of the scene, take away the tragedy of the death, take away all the moral and ethical implications that have been drilled into your head since grade one, do you know what you're left with? A 105-pound problem that needs to be moved from point A to point B."

Review: A well-crafted black comedy about a bachelor party gone wrong, very wrong. After a prostitute is accidentally killed in the suite of a Las Vegas hotel, events swing wildly out of control as five friends try to cover it up. Compounding guilt, anger and paranoia explodes as they turn on each other.

"You left a dead prostitute alone in the desert?"
"She's not alone..."

"I'm like a lighthouse! I stayed lit for you man! I never go dark. Never go dark!"

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Zathura (2005)

DVD: Anamorphic


"That's your robot?"
"At least I got one."
"Well, what does it do?"
"Anything I want... Get me a juice box, Beeyatch!"

Review: Jon Favreau has shown his talent for Directing once again. He has a great sense on how to tell a story and keep the most fantastical elements grounded in reality. This is a film of two brothers who start playing an old board game they find in the basement, sending their house into outer space. Each turn brings more excitement and danger from robots or aliens as they discover the only way to get home is to finish the game.

"I hate to break it to you, but that's not your call. He spun me, so it's up to him."
"Well, I'm Fleet Admiral, and I'm telling you to hit the road."
"I apologize, sir. I didn't... I didn't realize you were a Fleet Admiral. In fact, I... I'm a Fleet Admiral too! It's just a card, bug nuts."

"Still think I have gorgeous eyes?"

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Zoolander (2001)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"I guess the look I'm best known for is Blue Steel. And then there's Ferrari and Le Tigre. Le Tigre's a lot softer. It's a little bit more of a catalog look."

Review: This is a spoof movie of the fashion industry with great lines and lots of funny cameos. Ben Stiller plays a top male model who is brain-washed in an attempt to kill the new leader of Malaysia who wants to eliminate child labor.

"It's that damn Hansel! He's so hot right now!"

"Did you ever think that maybe there's more to life than being really, really, really, ridiculously good looking?"

"I think Katinka wants to kill you."
"Good! I deserve to die if I can't even beat Han-suck-ass in a walk off."
"Derek, that's not true. The guy had to miraculously pull his underwear out of his butt just to beat you."
"And all he had to do was turn left."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: You Don't Mess with the Zohan (2008)

DVD: Anamorphic


"I never worked at a pretzel stand. You like to insult people?"
"Was that your feet?"
"Yes, it's the feet. The feet uppercut... Here comes the double foot. This is good. Smell it, smell it, smell it. Now take it. That's for you."
"Aaaah! All right, let me go!!"

Review: I was very surprised. I loved this movie as much as I normally hate Adam Sandler movies. I think it is because of the help from Judd Apatow and Robert Smigel in writing the script. Also, Adam Sandler really became Zohan, an Israeli super soldier who moves to New York to become a hairdresser, instead of playing just another version of himself like in most of his movies.

"She has a free shoulder. Come join."
"I'm good."
"Mrs. Haynes, you're getting cold here. Claude, come. Keep her warm. Go ahead. Yes. And gently move. Gently move the shoulder. All you want to do is let her know you're here for her. Now look away like you're not even doing it. We're not doing this... Same rhythm."
"Okay."
"Push. Push. Push. Oh, you're pushing harder. It's starting to feel good on my end."

"Get out of here, Ahab, or I'll cut your eyes out."
"What you cut my eyes out with?"
"My blade, camel jockey."
"My friend, the beating I give you if you stop the spraying is much less than the beating I give you if you try to cut me."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Waking the Dead (2000)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"You, um, still haven't told me how you got the idea you wanted to be a Senator."
"That's not actually what I want. I want to be the President. Why are you smiling?"
"Because you mean it."

Review: A young lawyer is running for Congress but he is tormented by the memories of his activist girlfriend who died ten years earlier helping refugees from Chile. He starts to suspect that either she might still be alive or that he is going crazy. The movie is effective in showing their relationship in the early 70's and his election campaign in the 80's.

"I don't want to watch you turn into a cog in their machine."
"That's so fucking condescending. Sometimes cogs can make machines run a little bit better."
"Sometimes yes. Mostly they turn in circles and wear out. Then they get replaced."

"I am so sick of having to apologize for being an American."
"North American."
"Uh, God, I'm so sorry. Yes, North American. But I can't help noticing that when people run to freedom they tend to wash up on North American shores. This country is still the best that we've been able to do in the whole fucking history of the planet."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: War of the Worlds (2005)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"What is it? Is it terrorists?"
"These came from some place else."
"What do you mean, like, Europe?"
"No, Robbie, not like Europe!"

Review: This is an excellent movie of an alien invasion from the perspective of a small family on the run from the destruction. It is almost a perfect movie for about three-quarters until Ray and his daughter hide out in Ogilvy's basement and it slows down a bit. The rest of the movie is excellent but takes a half a star out of the movie's rating.

"Okay, hard-ass. You're in charge now? So what's your plan?"
"We catch up with these soldiers, and we head back there, and we get back at them! We get back at them!"
"Okay, now come up with a plan that DOESN'T involve your 10-year-old sister joining the Army! You got anything like that?"

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: X2: X-Men United (2003)

DVD: Anamorphic


"You know all those dangerous mutants you hear about in the news? I'm the worst one."

Review: This is the third best comic superhero movie after Spiderman 2 and Superman. This is just a fun movie that entertains immensely.

"What exactly do you teach, Professor Logan?"
"Art."

3 out of 4 Stars

Film: Wind (1992)

DVD: Anamorphic


"Well, don't worry about it. I mean, what could happen? Of course, my design could have a few flaws. And after a few weeks, Will and I discover we hate each other. Abigail proves to be the flake of the century; she can't raise a dime. A giant sandstorm comes along, knocks this place over, we go broke, the IRS throws us in jail. The State Department wants to throw me out of the country. But I fool them: in jail, I catch pneumonia and die."

Review: This a movie that turned me on to watching the America's Cup. It has a great story and has great cinematography. It is beautifully shot by the same director as "The Black Stallion". Stellan Skarsgaard is great as the boat's designer and the racing scenes make you feel like you are speeding along in the boat with the crew getting splashed by the waves.

"We're out in the desert, so bring some beer!"

4 out of 4 Stars

Film: When Harry Met Sally... (1989)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance."
"Which one am I?"
"You're the worst kind. You're high maintenance but you think you're low maintenance."

Review: This is a wonderful movie that comments on the relationships between men and women. That is always a ripe topic for conversation and this movie does it very well with the fake orgasm scene in the restaurant as the icing on the cake.

"No man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her."
"So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?"
"No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too."

3 out of 4 Stars

Film: What's Eating Gilbert Grape (1993)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"You're my knight in shimmering armor. Did you know that?"
"I think you mean shining."
"No shimmering. You shimmer, and you glow."

Review: This is Leonardo DiCaprio's best role ever. His mannerism and way of talking totally sell you in the believability of his mental illness. Johnny Dep plays a very subdued character, but it plays great as a foil with Arnie. This movie deserved some Oscars.

"I'm having a birthday party, but you're not invited, but you can come if you want."

"It's not going to happen again. This is the last time. Right Arnie?"
"It's the last time."
"Okay. Let's go."
"But I want to go back up there again."

4 out of 4 Stars

Film: Weird Science (1985)

DVD: Anamorphic


"We gotta make her as real as possible, Wyatt. I want her to live. I want her to breathe. I want her to aerobicize."

Review: This is a movie that took me three times to see it all because my parent's or my friend's parents would turn it off at the shower scene. ARRGH! This only made me more eager to see this film all the way through and it didn't disappoint. The movie was hilarious with Chet stealing all the scenes he was in.

"How 'bout a nice greasy pork sandwich served in a dirty ashtray?"

"Lady, I wanna get to the bottom of this. ASAFP."
"Oh, so do I."
"But first I'd like to... butter your muffin."
"Why do you have to be such a wanker?"
"Because I get off on it!"

4 out of 4 Stars

Film: Weekend at Bernie's (1989)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9 - Double Sided


"What kind of a host invites you to his house for the weekend and dies on you?"

Review: This is a very funny black comedy. It is filled with excellent physical humor and normally I don't point out the great job an actor does playing a corpse but the movie would not have worked without Terri Kiser's comedic portrayal of Bernie.

"Now you see, Larry? All of this could be yours if you set your goals and work hard."
"My old man worked hard. All they did was give him more work."

"This is the note. Listen. --Richard Parker and I stole this money from the company to pay for my sex-change operation--"
"Son of a bitch. I mean, it's not bad enough that he's trying to kill me. Now he's trying to turn me into a drag queen. Why couldn't he have said you were going to have the operation?"
"It doesn't matter, Larry, it doesn't matter."
"Oh, yes it does matter, Richard, it does matter. I have a reputation to protect here!"

3 1/2 out of 4 Stars

Film: The Wedding Singer (1998)

DVD: Anamorphic - Double Sided


"Hey, buddy, I'm not paying you to share your thoughts on life. I'm paying you to sing."
"Well, I have a microphone, and you don't, so you will listen to EVERY DAMN WORD I HAVE TO SAY!"

Review: This is the only Adam Sandler movie that I love. It is a great spoof of the 80's and it has some great songs. Drew Barrymore is totally cute in this movie and I think she is the reason that Adam Sandler was so good in this movie.

"You know, you should write a song about this. You could call it 'I got hit in the nose for sticking my face in other people's business'."
"Sounds like a country song!"

3 out of 4 Stars

Film: Wayne's World (1992)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"Cassandra. She's a fox. In French she would be called "la renarde" and she would be hunted, with only her cunning to protect her."

Review: This is one of the few movies that made the successful transition from a Saturday Night Live sketch to film. The "Bohemian Rhapsody" scene in the car was amazing and I remember singing it over and over again with my friends. I think this movie also revitalized Rob Lowe's career. This isn't the most polished movie, but it makes up for it in laughs.

"Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and played girl bunny?"
"No... No."
"Neither did I. I was just asking."

3 out of 4 Stars

Film: Wall Street (1987)

DVD: Anamorphic


"There's no nobility in poverty."

Review: I think this is Oliver Stone's best movie. It has great acting, great writing and captures an ideology on film.

"The point is ladies and gentlemen that greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Greed is right. Greed works. Greed clarifies, cuts through and captures the essence of the evolutionary spirit. Greed, in all of it's forms - greed for life, for money, knowledge - has marked the upward surge of mankind and greed - you mark my words - will not only save Teldar Paper but that other malfunctioning corporation called the USA. Thank you."

4 out of 4 Stars

Film: Volunteers (1985)

DVD: Anamorphic


"It's not that I can't help these people. It's just I don't want to."

Review: This is a funny movie but it is very un-even which prevents it from being great. Tom Hanks and John Candy give great performances but the story is a pretty weak. This is not a movie you search out to watch but it is one that if you come across on playing on TV it will suck you in and you will find yourself watching the whole thing.

"What did I say?"
"Move this log, and I'll sleep with each one of you... It's the easy way."

3 out of 4 Stars