Film: Mystery Date (1991)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9

Review: I was a sucker for these types of date movies when I was young and it still holds up.  Ethan Hawke plays Tom, a young man who has a crush on his next door neighbor but is too shy to ask her out. When his sophisticated older brother comes home from law school, he sets Tom up on the date with her and provides him with his ID so Tom can take her to a popular bar. The date quickly goes sideways when Tom finds a dead body in the trunk of his brother's car and the target of the cops and his brother's unsavory associates in a case of mistaken identity.

Quotes:

"Well, fine. Well then I'll just go over there and say, 'Hi, I'm Tom and you don't know me, but I've been spying on you for a couple of months now and I am finding you very attractive in a very real, very hormonal way.' And then she'll slap me silly."

"There are worse things in this world than getting slapped by a beautiful woman, you'll see."

"Alright, now the only problem with glasses is that they tend to fly off when a woman slaps you. Just don't flinch, you take it like a man, come off it smiling."

"You like lingerie, Tommy?"

"Well, I've really only read about it."

"We spend hours making ourselves look completely different, and then we go into some dark place where we really can't see each other anyway, and then we drink so we don't know if the other person is really interesting or just seems interesting 'cause they're pretending to be interested in the person that we're pretending to be."

"Uh, right. So I guess there's no getting around it. We're gonna have to lie to each other."

"...all because your loins led you out tonight."

"It was not my loins! I was... curious."

"Ah! In women, curiosity is an urge that springs from the loins."

"What, and not in men?"

"In men, everything is an urge that springs from the loins."

"That was awesome! We were almost killed!"

"Well, the night is still young."

3 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)

Blu-Ray


Review: A funny movie about an irresponsible father, played by Robin Williams, who loses custody of his kids after the divorce. Desperate to see his kids more often, he dresses up as an older woman to answer an ad placed my his ex-wife for a nanny/housekeeper. Robin's trademark humor along with the slapstick costume changes is very entertaining.

Quotes:
"Look at this! My first day as a woman and I'm getting hot flashes."

"We're his damn kids too."
"Heh, heh, kids say the darnedest things."
"Thank you. Any other choice phrases you'd like to teach our five year old, Daniel?"

"Could you make me a woman?"
"Honey, I'm so happy!"
"I knew you'd understand."

"It's not working. I need to go older."
"Older? You mean like a Shelley Winters older, or Shirley MacLaine older?"
"What's the difference?"
"Some Scotch tape and red hair dye."
"What about Joan Collins?"
"Oh, I don't think I have the strength. But I have some plaster."

"Isn't he fabulous?"
"If you like that handsome rugged type. But personally I prefer short, furry and funny."

"Oh, sir. I saw it! Some angry member of the kitchen staff, Did you not tip them? Oh, the terrorists! They ran that way. It was a run-by fruiting. I'll get them, sir. Don't worry."

"I like that Mediterranean look in women. Natural, healthy. Just the way God made you."
"Well, he broke the mold when he made me. He made me very special."
"He sure did."

"Mrs. Doubtfire."
"What?"
"You're going into the men's room."
"Huh? Oh, so it is. I do need new glasses dear. Sorry."

"Tell me, why would Mrs. Doubtfire be a good host?"
"I'm a hip old granny who can hip-hop, bebop, dance til ya drop and yo yo, make a wicked cup of cocoa."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Moonrise Kingdom (2012)

Blu-Ray

Review: A quirky Wes Anderson movie about a boy scout who runs away with his girlfriend on a small island in New England. Their past is told in flashbacks as they are tracked down by his troop and her parents.

Quotes:
"Jiminy cricket, he flew the coop!"

"What happened to your hand?"
"I got hit in the mirror."
"Really? How did that happen?"
"I lost my temper at myself."

"Why do you always use binoculars?"
"It helps me see things closer. Even if they're not very far away. I pretend it's my magic power."
"That sounds like poetry. Poems don't always have to rhyme, you know. They're just supposed to be creative."

"Sometimes I stick leaves on my hair. It helps cool your head down."
"Hmm. That's a good idea. It might also help if you didn't wear a fur hat."

"These are my books. I like stories with magic powers in them. Either in kingdoms on Earth or on foreign planets. Usually I prefer a girl hero, but not always."

"You can touch my chest. I, uh... I think they're gonna grow more."

"I'm a civil law scrivener. I'm authorized to declare births, deaths, and marriages. You're kind of young. You got a license?"
"No."
"I can't offer you a legally binding union. It won't hold up in the state, the county, or frankly, any courtroom in the world, due to your age, lack of a license, and failure to get parental consent. But the ritual does carry a very important moral weight within yourselves. You can't enter into the contract lightly. Look into my eyes. Do you love each other?"
"Yes, we do."

4 out 5 Stars

Film: Nothing to Lose (1997)

Digital Copy - Vudu (HDX)


Review: A mismatched-buddy comedy about an Ad Executive who is car-jacked shortly after he discovers his wife is having an affair. In his depressed state, he instead maces the robber (who only had an unloaded gun) and takes him on a wild car ride out of the city.

Quotes:
"Where do I start? It's not you. Well actually it is you. Look, I'm just not... I'm not attracted to you anymore. I need space. You kinda... you kinda gross me out. In the beginning it was different. In the beginning, you were better. But then I got to know you real well, and I came to realize... that you're a fat idiot."

"Hey, you ain't one of them desert slashers, are you? Cut a person's body up and leave it out in the desert in little tiny pieces and shit, huh? Oh shit! We are in the fucking desert! I'm in a car with a psycho freaky Jason hack-killer motherfucker! Hey, please don't kill me, freaky Jason. I said, please don't kill me, freaky Jason. I done fucked around and caught a ride with the wrong white boy!"

"Hey, is this your wife? Damn! I see why you were upset! Not bad Nick, not bad, Nick! You know, for a cheatin' bitch."
"Hey! Don't you call her that, you don't know her, don't say that."
"Okay, okay, no disrespect. What should I call her? Monogamously challenged?"

"I'm sure you're a really scary guy. I'm sure that, normally, people just quiver at the very sound of your voice. But, you see, I, I can't see that right now. I... I... I just see a weak, desperate little man... that probably grew up torturing little animals. Some puny, little uncoordinated... can't-make-the-football-team- so-I'll-pick-on-third-graders-and-steal-their-lunch-money... punk, jerk-off bully... that one day wakes up and realizes he's nothing. Just a sad, pathetic, useless, illiterate piece of inbred shit."
"Time to die."
"That just makes you my best friend."

"You can stay at my place, man."
"Thanks. Just for the night."
"What, did you think I was asking you to move in?"

"Now honestly, which one of us was scarier?"
"He was scarier."
"Really? You didn't find what he did as contrived?"
"No, it was scary."
"What part?"
"The 'freeze motherfucker' part was scary and he lead me to believe that if I moved my ass, it might be blown off."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

Blu-Ray


Review: This is my favorite Mad Max movie. Charlize Theron plays Imperator Furiosa, a top commander of the post-apocalyptic warlord, Immortan Joe. When she attempts to smuggle his five wives out of the fortress in a war rig, he chases her across the desert to get them back. Mad Max, played by Tom Hardy, starts out as a captive of Joe's War Boys until he joins forces with Furiosa on the war rig. Perfectly filmed action sequences with minimal CGI kept the thrill of the chase going for the entire film. Each sequence tops the one before it.

Quotes:
"Oh, what a day... what a lovely day!"

"It's all here! 3,000 gallons of guzzoline, just like you asked. I'm gonna unhitch the pod, you drop the rocks."
"You said, 'A few vehicles in pursuit, maybe.' We count THREE war parties!"
"Yeah, well, I got unlucky. Let's do this!"

"Hey. What's your name? What do I call you?"
"Does it matter?"
"Fine. When I yell 'fool', you drive out of here as fast as you can."

"Put a bullet in her skull. Stop the rig. Return my treasures to me and I myself will carry you to the gates of Valhalla."
"Am I awaited?"
"You will ride eternal, shiny and chrome."

"Ah, mediocre!"

"Hey, Rictus?"
"Yeah?"
"You lost a baby brother. Perfect in every way."
"I had a brother! I had a little baby brother! And he was perfect! Perfect in every way!"

"We are down 30,000 units of gasoline, 19 canisters of nitro, 12 assault bikes, 7 pursuit vehicles: the deficit mounts, and now sir, you have us stuck in a quagmire!"

"I like this plan... we could start again, just like the old days!"
"Look, it'll be a hard day. But I guarantee you that a hundred and sixty days ride that way... there's nothing but salt."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: My Super Ex-Girlfriend (2006)

Blu-Ray


Review: A funny movie from the director of "Ghostbusters" with Luke Wilson perfectly playing another everyman caught up in circumstances beyond his regular safe zone. Uma Thurman does a great job as the love-sick super hero who is out for revenge after Luke's character dumps her.

Quotes:
"She sounds like a nutcase."
"So you're saying she's perfect for me."

"I find your argument both repugnant and intriguing."
"That's kind of my thing."

"I'm sorry. I'll get you a new one."
"A bed or a penis?"
"Both."

"You're that Bedlam guy."
"Professor Bedlam."
"The super villain."
"Please, I am not super. I am not a villain. I'm just a regular man like yourself with a thousand times more money, intelligence and taste."

"Say, 'I'd rather have a chainsaw shoved up my ass than tell.'"
"Is that a possibility?"
"Say it!"
"Ok. I'd rather have a chainsaw shoved up my ass than tell."

"Why did G-Girl throw a shark at us?"

"I'm not going to help you kill her!"
"Kill? I didn't say 'kill'! I said 'neutralize'! It's a neutral word... like Switzerland!"

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Mission Impossible - Ghost Protocol (2011)

Blu-Ray


Review: While it doesn't reach the heights of III, mainly because it lacks a villain of Philip Seymour Hoffman's caliber, Ghost Protocol is a great entry in the series. The prison escape and Kremlin infiltration are fun sequences and Tom Cruise tops himself with the stunt climbing outside of the tallest building in the world, the Burj Khalifa.

Quotes:
"Mind telling me what you were doing in a Russian prison?"
"Mind telling me why you broke me out?"
"This wasn't a rescue mission?"
"Let me put it this way. If the secretary wanted me out of there, it must be pretty bad out here."

"Why would that work?"
"Why would what work?"
"The flare on the body, why would that work?"
"It did work."
"Yeah, I know, but... but why? I mean, how did you know that would draw their fire?"
"I didn't. I played a hunch."
"Okay. All right, so what was your scenario? There's a guy being shot at in the water. All of a sudden, decides to light up a flare and swim around? I mean, what did you assume they'd be thinking?"
"Thinking?"
"Yeah."
"I didn't assume they were thinking. I assumed they were shooting at anything that moved. I just gave them a target. Look, these guys aren't Rhodes Scholars, you know?"

"The Secretary is dead. The President has invoked Ghost Protocol. We're shut down. No satellite, safe house, support, or extraction. The four of us and the contents of this car are all that remains of the IMF."

"There's no way we can get to it from the inside."
"If we can't get to the server, we don't control the elevators, we don't control the security cameras. This operation is over before it begins."
"I'm telling you, we can get to it from the outside."
"We?"
"I'm... I'm on the computer."
"What floor is it on?"
"130."
"130? Vent ducts?"
"Pressure sensitive... Not enough time."
"Elevator shaft?"
"Infrared sensors... Not enough time."
"How am I supposed to do this?"

"22 minutes to door knock."
"The countdown is not helping."
"I'm just saying."

"OK, yeah, but you, um, just breezed over something I think is really important. The computer array part, where I just... jump?"
"And I catch you."
"Yeah."
"I don't... Why is that so hard to grasp?"
"Well, yeah, why? It's a 25 foot drop. And we're using magnets."
"Yeah."

"That's it. Next time, I get to seduce the rich guy."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Margin Call (2011)

Blu-Ray


Review: I just started watching this as a way to help distract myself before going on a first date with the woman who became my wife but it turned out to be a superb film about the beginning of the 2008 Great Recession. Zachary Quinto plays an analyst at a large Wall Street firm who discovers that his company is on the edge of financial disaster. Watching how this discovery travels up the chain of command and how the senior management end up dealing with it is fascinating. The film is well-written and tense throughout with a great cast.

Quotes:
"I run risk management... it just doesn't seem like a natural place to start cutting."

"This could be huge. The losses would be greater than the current value of the company."

"Peter, is this your work?"
"Mostly Mr. Dale's."
"But is this your draft?"
"Yes. Again, expanded on the original work by Mr. Dale. But, yes."
"What's your background?"
"My background?"
"Your CV."
"I've been with the firm for two and a half years, working with Eric that whole time. But I hold a doctorate in engineering, specialty in propulsion, from MIT with a bachelor's from Penn."
"What is a specialty in propulsion, exactly?"
"My thesis was a study in the ways that friction ratios affect steering outcomes in aeronautical use under reduced gravity loads."
"So you're a rocket scientist?"

"Maybe you could tell me what is going on. And please, speak as you might to a young child. Or a golden retriever. It wasn't brains that brought me here; I assure you that."

"So, what you're telling me, is that the music is about to stop, and we're going to be left holding the biggest bag of odorous excrement ever assembled in the history of capitalism."
"Sir, I not sure that I would put it that way, but let me clarify using your analogy. What this model shows is the music, so to speak, just slowing. If the music were to stop, as you put it, then this model wouldn't even be close to that scenario. It would be considerably worse."
"Let me tell you something, Mr. Sullivan. Do you care to know why I'm in this chair with you all? I mean, why I earn the big bucks."
"Yes."
"I'm here for one reason and one reason alone. I'm here to guess what the music might do a week, a month, a year from now. That's it. Nothing more. And standing here tonight, I'm afraid that I don't hear... a... thing. Just... silence."

"You know, the funny thing is, tomorrow if all of this goes tits up they're gonna crucify us for being too reckless but if we're wrong, and everything gets back on track? Well then, the same people are gonna laugh till they piss their pants cause we're gonna all look like the biggest pussies God ever let through the door."

"So you think we might have put a few people out of business today. That its all for naught. You've been doing that everyday for almost forty years, Sam. And if this is all for naught then so is everything out there. Its just money; its made up. Pieces of paper with pictures on it so we don't have to kill each other just to get something to eat. It's not wrong. And it's certainly no different today than its ever been. 1637, 1797, 1819, 37, 57, 84, 1901, 07, 29, 1937, 1974, 1987 (Jesus, didn't that fuck up me up good) 92, 97, 2000 and whatever we want to call this. It's all just the same thing over and over. We can't help ourselves. And you and I can't control it, or stop it, or even slow it. Or even ever-so-slightly alter it. We just react. And we make a lot money if we get it right. And we get left by the side of the side of the road if we get it wrong. And there have always been and there always will be the same percentage of winners and losers. Happy foxes and sad sacks. Fat cats and starving dogs in this world. Yeah, there may be more of us today than there's ever been. But the percentages-they stay exactly the same."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: Midnight in Paris (2011)

Blu-Ray


Review: Probably my favorite Woody Allen movie now. It just sweeps you up so you share in Gil's enchantment with the city of Paris as he travels back and forth in time between the present and the 1920s. Gil is a successful Hollywood screenwriter visiting the city with his fiancee while struggling with a decision to abandon his profession and stay in Paris to finish his novel.

Quotes:
"Can you picture how drop dead gorgeous this city is in the rain? Imagine this town in the '20s. Paris in the '20s, in the rain. The artists and writers!"
"Why does every city have to be in the rain? What's wonderful about getting wet?"

"He's a pseudo-intellectual. Just a little bit."
"Ah, Gil, I hardly think he'd be lecturing at the Sorbonne if he's a pseudo-intellectual."

"Ah, now here's a superb Picasso. If I'm not mistaken, he painted this marvelous portrait of his French mistress, Medeline Brissou, in the 20's."
"Oh, Paul, I'm going to have to differ with you on this one."
"Really?"
"Gil, Gil, just pay attention. You might learn something."
"Okay, well, if I'm not mistaken, this was a failed attempt to capture a young French girl named Adriana, from Bordeaux, if my art history serves me, who came to Paris to study costume design for the theater. And I'm pretty sure she had an affair with Modigliani, then Braque, which is how Pablo met her. Picasso. Of course, what you don't get from this portrait is the subtlety in her beauty. She was just a knockout."
"What have you been smoking?"
"I'd hardly call this picture marvelous. It's more of a petit bourgeois statement on how Pablo sees her... saw her. He's distracted by the fact that she was an absolute volcano in the sack."

"I would like you to read my novel and get your opinion."
"I hate it."
"You haven't even read it yet."
"If it's bad, I'll hate it. If it's good, then I'll be envious and hate it even more. You don't want the opinion of another writer."

"500 francs for a Matisse? Yeah I think that sounds fair! You know, I wonder if actually I can pick up 6 or 7?"

"You'll never write well if you fear dying. Do you?"
"Yeah, I do. I'd say probably, might be my greatest fear actually."
"It's something all men before you have done, all men will do."
"I know, I know."
"Have you ever made love to a truly great woman?"
"Actually, my fiancée is pretty sexy."
"And when you make love to her, do you feel true and beautiful passion? And do you for at least that moment, lose your fear of death?"
"No, that doesn't happen."

"Hemingway did have one plot suggestion. He doesn't quite believe that the protagonist doesn't see that his fiancée is having an affair right before his eyes."

"These people don't have any antibiotics!"
"What are you talking about?"
"Adriana, if you stay here though, and this becomes your present then pretty soon you'll start imagining another time was really your... You know, was really the golden time. Yeah, that's what the present is. It's a little unsatisfying because life's a little unsatisfying."
"That's the problem with writers. You are so full of words."

5 out of 5 stars

Film: Michael (1996)

DVD: Full Screen


Review: One of my favorite John Travolta movies where he plays the angel, Michael, visiting Earth for one last trip from Heaven. While Travolta always overacts in his villain roles, he is perfect when he gets to glide along as a charismatic protagonist with his charm. William Hurt plays the weary tabloid reporter who is eager to get the angel back to Chicago for a photo shoot while Michael is more interested in the sightseeing along the road. Andie MacDowell always seems to pick the right projects as she is in several of my favorite films.

Quotes:
"That is a genuine angel. Huey discovered it."
"Is it for real?"
"Absolutely."
"You're gonna go get me this angel?"
"That's exactly what we're going to do."
"We'll put it on the front page, BOLD! Some white fluffy clouds... a drift of sky... and some musical notes... YES!"
"Poetry."
"Don't play with me, Quinlan. You really are going to fetch me this angel for Christmas... or... I fire the two of you."

"Last night we were discussing your wings. Would you mind if I took a closer look?"
"Let them look at your wings, Michael. They're from the National Mirror."
"They're not bad... Would you mind if I touched?"
"I'd rather you didn't."
"We'd like to take a look to see how you have these things attached."
"Why don't you pull on your pecker and see how that's attached?"
"Watch your language, mister."
"Pecker? An angel that says pecker."

"I just thought..."
"Halos? Inner light?"
"Yes!"
"I'm not that kind of angel."
"What kind of angel are you?"
"Michael is an archangel. He battled Lucifer and threw him out of Heaven. Revelations 12, verse 7."
"That was a long time ago."
"He smote a bank for me."

"On one condition, you'll owe me something."
"Money? Yeah, I can't quote a figure, but there'll be plenty of money, I promise you that. Once the world sees pictures of these babies..."
"No. You'll owe me an apology."
"An apology, for what? Yeah. Sure, I apologize. Whatever."
"Not now. When I say so."

"Michael, we are not stopping."
"You have ten seconds to change your mind. Ten hippopotamus... nine hippopotamus... eight hippopotamus... seven hippopotamus... six hippopotamus... five hippopotamus... four hippopotamus... THREE, TWO ONE!"
{POP}
"There is no jack. Of course there is no jack."
"Just ask him to fix it. He blew it. He can fix it."
"Fix this tire! Come back here and fix this tire!"
"No can do."

"It's cookies, he smells like cookies, and the smell gets stronger when he's in heat."

"We're here, Michael. Look up."
"The Sears Tower in Chicago is the world's tallest building. It stand's 1,454 feet above street level, contains enough concrete for an eight lane highway."
"Quinlan, I'm so sorry. I didn't do what I came for. I didn't finish. I'm so sorry. Goodbye."
"Goodbye, Michael."
"Thanks for letting me have a little fun."

"You know, Pansy, I invented marriage."
"Oh Michael?"
"Well, I did. Before that, you should have seen it. Everybody was so mixed up that they didn't know what to do. So I said, 'Have a ceremony'."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist (2008)

Blu-Ray


Review: A cute film that follows several teenagers as they travel around Manhattan one night searching for their favorite band's secret concert venue. Nick's is still trying to get over his ex-girlfriend when he meets Norah, his true musical soulmate, but it takes him a while to fight off his depressive funk and realize it.

Quotes:
"Also that mix CD... uh, that I left on your doorstep was the last one that I'll be making for you. More or less..."

"Ohh! It's much better than the uni-boob."
"This isn't going to work, okay. He's hung up on Tris."
"You look gorgeous. And let me tell you something, Nicky is definitely worth the underwire. He just needs a little push, that's all."

"You don't have to yell. It's not a train station. We're in a tiny car."

"Are you off-duty?"
"This isn't a cab."
"Are you off-duty?"
"It's not a cab, my friend, I promise you."

"Okay. I'm just gonna tell you something. I was kidnapped tonight. Seriously. In this van with these guys talking about going balls deep. Sounds like fun, right? Not always. Scary."

"If anyone is getting raped in that van, it'll be a guy."

"I never wash my pants. I like to keep the night on them."

"Are you sad that we missed it?"
"We didn't miss it. This IS it. C'mon. You wanna go home?"

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: The Other Guys (2010)

Blu-Ray


Review: A very funny movie centered around less heroic 3rd String detectives who stumble onto a massive financial fraud case. This is Mark Wahlberg's first comedy, but he successfully builds off the comedic aspects of the foul-mouthed police sergeant he played in "The Departed" and he interacts well with Will Ferrell's forensic accounting detective who loves doing the desk-work other cops despise. Directed by the Adam McKay of "Anchorman", the film is filled with improvisations and quotable lines.

Quotes:
"What is this?"
"It's my car, it's a Prius."
"I feel like we're literally driving around in a vagina."

"If you were in the wild, I would attack you, even if you weren't in my food chain. I would go out of my way to attack you. If I were a lion and you were a tuna, I would swim out in the middle of the ocean and freaking eat you and then I'd bang your tuna girlfriend."
"OK, first off: a lion, swimming in the ocean. Lions don't like water. If you placed it near a river or some sort of fresh water source, that make sense. But you find yourself in the ocean, 20 foot waves, I'm assuming off the coast of South Africa, coming up against a full grown 800 pound tuna with his 20 or 30 friends, you lose that battle, you lose that battle 9 times out of 10. And guess what, you've wandered into our school of tuna and we now have a taste of lion. We've talked to ourselves. We've communicated and said 'You know what, lion tastes good, let's go get some more lion'."

"You know what, I'm going to hang onto the wooden gun."
"To give me back my real gun?"
"No. I'm going to give you this... It's a rape whistle. You blow that if you're in any trouble, and someone with an actual gun will come and help you out."

"Your farts aren't manly."
"Are you serious?"
"They sound like a baby blowing out birthday candles."

"At age 11, I audited my parents. Believe me, there were some discrepancies, and I was grounded."

"I think the best way to tell the story is by starting at the end, briefly, then going back to the beginning, and then periodically returning to the end, maybe giving different characters' perspectives throughout. Just to give it a bit of dynamism, otherwise it's just sort of a linear story."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: The Matador (2005)

Blu-Ray


Review: This is not an action film like the title and poster suggest, but a talky dramatic comedy about an assassin suffering from a mid-life crisis. Without any friends from his solitary lifestyle on the road, he latches onto a equally-troubled businessman staying in his hotel in Mexico City. While Pierce Brosnan was a decent James Bond, it is his anti-hero roles like in this film and in "The Tailor of Panama" where he really shines.

Quotes:
"I'm as serious as an erection problem."

"Margaritas always taste better in Mexico.
"They certainly do."
"Margaritas and cock... Sorry about the cock thing, it's kind of a conversation stopper."

"A Vietnamese girl I once knew had her legs so locked together I couldn't get a whiff of her spring roll. Two drinks, half a quaalude later, I was at an all you can eat buffet. Every lock can be broken. It's just a matter of will and whether it's worth it."

"I need a break. There's no retirement home for assassins is there? Archery at four. Riflery at five."
"Goddamn it, Julian, you leave the game, even for a while, I don't know if they'll gonna let you back in. And then what the hell are you gonna do? Waste your days picking up illiterate teenagers for suck-and-fuck sessions behind the Old Navy store?"
"Sounds delightful to me."

"An assassin without confidence is a horrible thing to behold. It's like a relief pitcher who fumbles the ball."
"Please tell me you know you mixed two sports in a metaphor."
"Huh? Yeah, I can't do that."

"Just consider me the best cocktail party story you ever met."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: The Night We Never Met (1993)

DVD: Anamorphic


Review: Not as good as I remembered it, but still entertaining. This film is about an engaged Wall Street trader who decides to hold onto his bachelor pad as a place to party with his friends a couple nights a week and rent the place out for the remaining nights. The other two tenants are Annabella Sciorra, a married painter, and Matthew Broderick, an aspiring cook, who rent it on alternate nights as a place to escape their regular lives. The plot follows the three separate stories of the roommates who never meet until they cross paths at the end.

Quotes:
"Sam, Mr. McVeigh would like to offer you this place, two days a week, $92 dollars a month."
"Sold!"
"You mean you don't mind that it's just two days a week?"
"Oh, no. Actually, it's all I can afford right now. I am already renting a place... with roommates. Lots and lots of roommates."
"Oh, well then I'm sure you will enjoy some privacy two nights a week."

"Can you like hold me or something?"
"I thought we were done... You know, uh, you're really a great fuck."
"I can't believe you just said that."
"But it's true."

"It wasn't my idea. Her folks got us season tickets, every Wednesday."
"Aren't you here Wednesdays?"
"No. That's why I had to switch my nights with, uh..."
"Sam?"
"Yeah."
"Oh... Oh... Oh my God!"
"What?"
"Oh my God?"
"What?"
"I slept with the wrong guy. Oh my God. The one time in my life I cheat and I screw it up and sleep with the wrong guy. How could you?!! How could you sleep with me?!"
"You slept with me."
"Yeah, that's because I though you were someone else!"
"Boy, what a way to make a guy feel wanted."

"Oh Inga! Inga, you waited."
"You are welcome to me."
"Thank you God!"

3 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)

Blu-ray


Review: This is a great piece of work and you can tell that it is a made by a master of a director, Peter Weir. I have always liked movies based on the British sailing navy, but have always wanted to see one made with today's technology. The sailing battles are amazing and Russell Crowe was made for this type of role. I think that this is one of the best movie of 2003.

Favorite Scene: The naval battle in the fog.

Quotes:
"Damn, he was good. Just came out of nowhere. Hit us with a full broadside and cut across our tail and took out our rudder. Damn fine gunnery. We only slipped away because of the fog. Quite fortunate, really. He may have had the weather gauge, but we had the weather gods."

"The Surprise is not old. No one would call her old. She has a bluff bow, lovely lines. She's a fine seabird: weatherly, stiff and fast... very fast, if she's well handled. No, she's not old. She's in her prime."

"Well done, Gentleman. To wives and to sweethearts."
"To wives and sweethearts!"
"May they never meet."

"What is it with this man? Did I kill a relative of his in battle, perhaps? His boy, God forbid?"
"He fights like you, Jack."

"Timing?"
"Two minutes and one second, sir."
"Lads, that's not good enough. We need to fire two broadsides to her one. You wanna see a guillotine in Picadilly?"
"NO!"
"Do you want to call that raggedy-ass Napoleon your king?"
"NO!"
"You want your children to sing 'La Marseillaise'?"
"NO!"
"Mr. Mowett, Mr. Pullings, starboard battery! Jump to it, lads. Cadence and rhythm."

"We shall head home before peace breaks out with France, God forbid."
"Jack, I fear you may have burdened me with a debt I can never fully repay."
"Tosh. Name a shrub after me. Something prickly and hard to eradicate."
"A shrub? Nonsense. I'll name a great tortoise after you. Testudo Aubreii."

"England is under threat of invasion. And though we be on the far side of the world, this ship is our home. This ship IS England."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: Money Train (1995)

Blu-Ray


Review: This is a perfect little action film. It's got the amazing chemistry between Wesley Snipes and Woody Harrelson, Jennifer Lopez at her most attractive, and a great loathsome villain in their overbearing boss, Robert Blake. The heist plot to steal from the New York Subway's revenue train is a simple but effective framework for the fun performances, including a small role for Chris Cooper as the Torch.

Quotes:
"You're stopping trains. I wanna know why."
"We got a police action, sir. Six line, south of Wall Street. Decoy cops in the tunnel."
"Where is the revenue train?"
"We're holding it at Wall Street."
"Send it though."
"Sir, we got cops on the tracks down there."
"Send it through! Nothing stops the money train."

"You got any cash on you?"
"What for?"
"Well, if you must know, I'm buying you a Christmas present."
"You're gonna buy me a Christmas present with my money?"
"Yeah, so don't be stingy."
"You know, you never cease to amaze me."
"You don't have to count it. I trust you, man. I'm out, see ya."
"So you're really gonna buy me a present, huh?"
"I love you, man!"
"If you love me, let me keep my money."

"No, you ain't gonna hit him."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm gonna hit him!"

"You do much decoy?"
"Six months in the outer boroughs. I liked it. But this transfer's definitely a lucky break. And they say you guys are the best."
"Oh, well, modesty prevents me from... Well, no, it does not. We are the best. You see the way he's swaying back and forth. He's got his arm swinging, you know, like he wants to take a whiz but he forgot how? He got that from me."

"You're right on the edge. You're a wreck looking for someplace to happen. I'll be there, and I'll fuck you dead."
---------
"Do you think he wants to fuck us before we're dead or fuck us afterwards?
"I understood that when we're dead, that's when he wants to fuck us."
"Either way, it's a pain in the ass."

"Hey Charlie, come back to Earth, man. All right, just... just calm down. Come on. Come on, now."
"What are you talking about?"
"Look, look. Charles, we're not gonna rob the money train."
"Why not?"
"Because, uh, uh... we're cops. And you know, remember: Serve, protect, break a mugger's neck, all of that. That's our credo."

"Hey, don't turn your back on me, bro!"
"Whoa, whoa. Now, we're not brothers, all right? We don't think alike, we don't act alike, and we damn sure don't look alike. Ever since we were kids, I've been carrying you on my back. I wipe your fucking nose, I clean up your messes. And now I'm gonna give up my badge... and my career for YOU? No, no. This is shaking time. You can get the fuck out of my life."

"Oh, now's your chance to turn me in and get a medal."
"Or you can get this damn train moving and get us the hell out of here."
"Thought you'd never ask."
"Charlie, when this is over with, remind me to knock you out."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Out for Justice (1991)

Blu-Ray


Review: Steven Seagal peaked with Under Siege but his earlier work created consistently great genre films. What raises this one is the intense acting by William Forsythe as the coked-up, short-tempered villain, Richie Madano, who terrifies and disgusts even his fellow criminals. The story takes place over one day as Seagal, the Brooklyn detective Gino, hunts down the cop-killer who wants to go out in a frenzy of violence.

Quotes:
"Why won't this man run?"
"You know, Vic. You never understood nothing about the neighborhood. Did you, huh?"
"No, I guess I never did."
"Let me tell you something. You kill a cop on 18th Avenue in front of a hundred witnesses, you're gonna die. The only difference is, this guy wants to die in his own neighborhood."

"Hey Vinnie! How you doing?"
"Officer Big Shot, come to bust my balls? This here is a detective! In what, Narcotics now?"
"That's right."
"Now I want you all to be very nice and tell this big fucking mamaluke over here anything he wants to know."
"Vinnie, come over here. Listen, you shouldn't talk to me that way because, like, you and I don't know each other so good. You were still sucking your thumb when your brother was going around town sucking dicks."

"The only balls he has is that badge and gun."
"Is that right? Let me show you something. Here's my gun! Fair game, now, okay? And here's my badge! This is your trophy. This is your trophy, okay?! Come and get it. Tell one of your fuckin citriolis to come and get it."
"I offer 5,000 for that badge, right now."

"Gino, you have not even told me what I've been arrested for."
"Let me see here. What could we do? Ah, how about 240.25?"
"What's that?"
"Prostitution, honey."
"Are you fucking kidding me?! Let me out of here right now, Gino!"
"I told you I was going to do this. Now, how's your memory? Who is Roxanne?"
"Gino, you're really starting to piss me off!"
"Jack, did you ever find this one over here on the street?"
"Many times."
"And how much was she?"
"10 bucks."
"Oh, ten bucks this, my friend! Fuck you, Gino!"

"After pop died... and the neighborhood kids wanted to go to Coney Island or something to play... one of the other fathers, Mr. Madano, used to slip me a little money so I could go play with the kids too. You know how I repayed Mr. Madano? You know how I thanked him tonight? I arrested him. Just so I could get to Richie. That's how crazy I am."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Once (2006)

DVD: Anamorphic


Review: A modern musical about a street musician and an immigrant girl from the Czech Republic who bond over music in Dublin, Ireland. It's a simple story supported by a strong collection of songs. Their first duet in the music shop was amazing and a deserving winner for the Best Song Oscar.

Quotes:
"How come you don't play this song during daytime? I see you everyday."
"You know, during the day, people want to hear songs they know, just songs that they recognize. I mean, otherwise, I wouldn't make any money. I play these song at night. They wouldn't listen."
"I listen."
"Yeah, but you gave me ten cent."

"Good to meet ya. We've got a few little bits and pieces to set up. I want to check the drums inside."
"We've already set up the kit."
"Yeah, I just want to, you know, check them for sound."
"I checked them already. It's fine."
"Okay, we need to set up mics on them for recording, yeah?"
"Oh."

"I think it's time we did the, uh, car test."
"What's the car test, Eamon?"
"We've been listening back on these big studio speakers. So it's time we had a go on some shitty speakers. So... Let's go for a spin and have a listen in me car."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Nowhere to Run (1993)

DVD: Fullscreen - 1:33


"I'm not too optimistic about our young friend's success. Some of these landowners can be hard nuts to crack."
"Then we use a hammer."

Review: This one reminds me of Road House, another well-made B movie. I think it is Jean-Claude Van Damme's best film outside of "Bloodsport" & "Kickboxer". He's supported with a good script and high production values. It's got two good villians in the actors who played the cross-dressing serial killer in "Silence of the Lambs" and the nasty South African diplomat in "Lethal Weapon 2".

"Get out of the truck."
"You're scaring my children!!"
"Get out of the truck!!"
"Leave them alone."
"Who the hell are you?"
"I'm the parking attendant and you're bothering my customers."

"Astonishing, isn't it? One little woman in the middle of a wheat field. And what is she doing? She's fucking us up."

"Don't get caught, you understand?"
"I thought the local law was taken care of."
"Yeah, he's been paid, but I'm not sure he's bought."

"Au revoir, fucker."

4 out of 5 Stars

Film: Open Range (2003)

DVD: Enhanced 16x9


"You know, folks in Fort Harmon country don't take to free grazers or free grazing. They hate them more than they used to hate the Indians."
"I expect by 'folks', you mean ranchers like yourself."
"There ain't no free-graze cattle gonna take the feed off my cattle on this range."
"Free graze is legal."
"Times change, Mr. Spearman. Most folks change with them. A few holdouts never do."

Review: The highlight of this film is the final shoot-out, one of the best ever. It is a long film, but the only time the pacing dragged was in the budding relationship between Kevin Costner and Annette Bening's characters. The last scene between them before the fight was redundant. Robert Duvall was great as ever and the cinematography was excellent.

"Way I figure it, we can leave the cattle and run, or you and me can go in the dark and stop them before they scatter the herd."
"You reckon them cows are worth getting killed over?"
"The cows are one thing. But one man telling another where he can go in this country's something else."

"You the one killed our friend?"
"That's right?"

4 out of 5 Stars