"You know what's sad? Here's something wild, Martin Luther King stood for non-violence. Now what is Martin Luther King? A street. I don't give a fuck where you are in America, if you're on Martin Luther King Boulevard, there's some violence going down. It ain't the safest place to be. And you can't call someone and tell them you are lost on MLK. 'Hey, I'm lost on Martin Luther King.' 'RUN! RUN! RUN!'"
Review: This is the stand-up routine that made me sit-up and recognize Chris Rock as a talented comedian instead of the annoying comic on Saturday Night Live with all the bad skits. This is probably the best stand-up comedy concert ever filmed, even better than Eddie's "Raw" and "Delirious". It is hilarious but also tackles taboo subjects with amazing deftness.
"They was interviewing a brother in there, they said now, 'Sir, when a new inmate comes in and he wants some drugs, how do you initiate him?' The guy goes, 'Well, the first thing I do is make him toss my salad.' The guy's like, 'Toss my salad? What's that?' The guy: 'Well, having your salad tossed means having your asshole eaten out with jelly or with syrup. I prefer syrup.' I'm not making this up!"
"Men don't have platonic friends. Okay. We just have women we haven't fucked YET. As soon as I figure this out, I'm in there. I mean, I got some platonic friends, but they're all by accident. Every platonic friend I got is someone I was trying to fuck, made a wrong turn somewhere, and ended up in the friend zone."
"Women are trying to be good, but not too good. Sometimes, women have to ration out the pussy. They want men to think they got a good women, but they don't want them to think they got a freak. They got to ration out the pussy. Okay, I'll fuck him now, but I won't suck his dick for two weeks. All right, I'll suck his dick, but I won't lick his balls till next week. All right, I'll lick his balls, but I won't lick his ass till next year. See men, we got to use all our tricks right away, whatever we got, just give whatever. We can't hold nothing back. We don't know if there will be any return engagements. So we got to... go.. for... it."
"It's hard not to cheat. Women don't want to hear that shit. It's hard not to cheat. You know why it's hard not to cheat? Women like guys who are in a relationship. Guys know what I'm talking about. When you're single, nobody was thinking about your ugly ass. Then your women got a hold of you; cut your hair, washed you down, gave you a lifesaver, wiped all the crust out of your eye. Now everybody wants to fuck ya. When you were single, no one was calling your ass up. Now your phone is ringing off the hook. Crazy, freaky sex talk, like 'Hey, what are you doing? You know, me and my girlfriend are having a dick sucking contest and we thought you would be a good judge."
5 out of 5 Stars
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