Film: Nothing to Lose (1997)

Digital Copy - Vudu (HDX)


Review: A mismatched-buddy comedy about an Ad Executive who is car-jacked shortly after he discovers his wife is having an affair. In his depressed state, he instead maces the robber (who only had an unloaded gun) and takes him on a wild car ride out of the city.

Quotes:
"Where do I start? It's not you. Well actually it is you. Look, I'm just not... I'm not attracted to you anymore. I need space. You kinda... you kinda gross me out. In the beginning it was different. In the beginning, you were better. But then I got to know you real well, and I came to realize... that you're a fat idiot."

"Hey, you ain't one of them desert slashers, are you? Cut a person's body up and leave it out in the desert in little tiny pieces and shit, huh? Oh shit! We are in the fucking desert! I'm in a car with a psycho freaky Jason hack-killer motherfucker! Hey, please don't kill me, freaky Jason. I said, please don't kill me, freaky Jason. I done fucked around and caught a ride with the wrong white boy!"

"Hey, is this your wife? Damn! I see why you were upset! Not bad Nick, not bad, Nick! You know, for a cheatin' bitch."
"Hey! Don't you call her that, you don't know her, don't say that."
"Okay, okay, no disrespect. What should I call her? Monogamously challenged?"

"I'm sure you're a really scary guy. I'm sure that, normally, people just quiver at the very sound of your voice. But, you see, I, I can't see that right now. I... I... I just see a weak, desperate little man... that probably grew up torturing little animals. Some puny, little uncoordinated... can't-make-the-football-team- so-I'll-pick-on-third-graders-and-steal-their-lunch-money... punk, jerk-off bully... that one day wakes up and realizes he's nothing. Just a sad, pathetic, useless, illiterate piece of inbred shit."
"Time to die."
"That just makes you my best friend."

"You can stay at my place, man."
"Thanks. Just for the night."
"What, did you think I was asking you to move in?"

"Now honestly, which one of us was scarier?"
"He was scarier."
"Really? You didn't find what he did as contrived?"
"No, it was scary."
"What part?"
"The 'freeze motherfucker' part was scary and he lead me to believe that if I moved my ass, it might be blown off."

4 out of 5 Stars

TV: American Dad! - Volume 08 (2011-2012)

DVD - 3 Discs


Review: Another great season!

Quotes:
"Oh, man. Classic 'American Dad'."

"Steve, we said we were gonna be good this year. We're co-presidents of the Good Boy Club. Did that kiss oath mean nothing?"

"Nice girls don't kiss on the first date, Steve. Your mom wouldn't kiss me until our third date. It made the sex on the first two dates very impersonal."

"Steve's at the age where he doesn't care about going to a ballgame with his dad. All he's interested in is girls. He doesn't want ballgames, he just wants to ball dames. Huh? Huh?"

"Class, this is Phyllis. She just moved here from Hoboken. I'd like you all to give her a warm welcome. Now, I'm not referring to the sexual position, the warm welcome of which I am the inventor. The basic nature of the move is... Oh, never mind. Y'all ain't long enough."

"You're really gonna kill five people over $20?"
"Are you really asking that to the guy who just last week killed six people over $19?"

"You're a complicated man, Smith. I would love to do mushrooms with you."

"I think I'm going to ask her out."
"You? You're a three-foot-tall, gray, disgusting piece of shit! Scarlett's an angel. You're a pig. She would never go for you."
"Listen, you, that hurts. I like to think of myself as a pretty strong person, but you... you cracked it."

"Welco... welcome home, space lothario. You might have slept with Scarlett, but I'm wearing your robe. Ha!"
"Hey, that's my pooping robe. I can tell by all the poop on the edges."

"That punch. That punch right there. That's the punch where everything went black and I was finally able to achieve orgasm."

"I have grandchildren? Oh, my God, I can't believe it! I thought my only chance was if Steve got raped by a confused lesbian."

"Steve, I just did a big Trader Joe's run. Pour yourself some unsweetened cherry juice. Maybe have it with some sunflower paste on a flax crisp. There's also a scallop shu mai that tastes like nothing and a mushroom flatbread pizza that smells like nut sack."

"Oh. Dr. Vadgers says my lab work requires more information. He needs to see my boobs popping out of a cheerleading outfit... I know what you're thinking. What is the boob test going to tell him that the butthole test didn't? He's just being super careful."

"You think this fake detective agency with real cases in a pretend office in your father's garage is a joke?"

"So do you like music?"
"Do I like music? No, no, I'm the one person on Earth who doesn't like music."

"Hey Bones, look at this bone."
"I know, but did you see this bone?"
"Where'd you find that bone?"
"Same place you got your bone. It was just sitting here next to this bone."
"Dr. Brennan? Bone call. They said it was important. Something about a bone?"

"Stan, I know you're upset."
"Upset?! I'm just now finding out my daughter might not even be mine. I can't believe it. I mean, I changed her diapers, I fed her, I clothed her, I got her braces, I sent her to college. Holy shit, that guy owes me so much money."

"Damn, I look good in this! Tilda Swinton good."

"Now son, these Mexican callgirls have seen thousands of men. So when they tell you you're the best they've ever had, it's quite a compliment."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

Blu-Ray


Review: This is my favorite Mad Max movie. Charlize Theron plays Imperator Furiosa, a top commander of the post-apocalyptic warlord, Immortan Joe. When she attempts to smuggle his five wives out of the fortress in a war rig, he chases her across the desert to get them back. Mad Max, played by Tom Hardy, starts out as a captive of Joe's War Boys until he joins forces with Furiosa on the war rig. Perfectly filmed action sequences with minimal CGI kept the thrill of the chase going for the entire film. Each sequence tops the one before it.

Quotes:
"Oh, what a day... what a lovely day!"

"It's all here! 3,000 gallons of guzzoline, just like you asked. I'm gonna unhitch the pod, you drop the rocks."
"You said, 'A few vehicles in pursuit, maybe.' We count THREE war parties!"
"Yeah, well, I got unlucky. Let's do this!"

"Hey. What's your name? What do I call you?"
"Does it matter?"
"Fine. When I yell 'fool', you drive out of here as fast as you can."

"Put a bullet in her skull. Stop the rig. Return my treasures to me and I myself will carry you to the gates of Valhalla."
"Am I awaited?"
"You will ride eternal, shiny and chrome."

"Ah, mediocre!"

"Hey, Rictus?"
"Yeah?"
"You lost a baby brother. Perfect in every way."
"I had a brother! I had a little baby brother! And he was perfect! Perfect in every way!"

"We are down 30,000 units of gasoline, 19 canisters of nitro, 12 assault bikes, 7 pursuit vehicles: the deficit mounts, and now sir, you have us stuck in a quagmire!"

"I like this plan... we could start again, just like the old days!"
"Look, it'll be a hard day. But I guarantee you that a hundred and sixty days ride that way... there's nothing but salt."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: Inception (2010)

Blu-Ray



Review: While Christopher Nolan still struggles to film coherent action scenes, he is much improved in this mind-bending thriller. Inception is a film about a thief, Leonardo DiCaprio, who steals valuable information from his victim's memories by sneaking into their dreams. Swayed by an offer to clear his name, he takes on his toughest job, planting a false memory so deep into his target's mind that they think it is their own.

Quotes:
"You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling."

"Why are they all looking at me?"
"Because my subconscious feels that someone else is creating this world. The more you change things, the quicker the projections start to converge on you."
"Converge?"
"It's the foreign nature of the dreamer. They attack like white blood cells fighting an infection."
"They're going to attack us?"
"No. Just you."

"It would have to be a 747."
"Why is that?"
"Because in a 747, the pilot's up top, and the first class cabin's in the nose, so no one would walk through. But you'd have to buy out the entire cabin. And the first class flight attendant..."
"I bought the airline... It seemed neater."

"If I get on this plane and you don't honor our agreement, when we land, I go to jail for the rest of my life."
"Complete the job en route. I make one phone call from the plane. You'll have no trouble getting through Immigration."

"Great. Thank you. So, now we're trapped in Fischer's mind battling his own private army, and if we get killed, we'll be lost in limbo till our brains turn to scrambled egg."

"What's happening?"
"Your subconscious is looking for the dreamer; me. Quick, give me a kiss."
"They're still looking at us."
"Yeah, it was worth a shot."

"I can't stay with her anymore because she doesn't exist."
"I'm the only thing you do believe in anymore."
"I wish. I wish more than anything. But I can't imagine you with all your complexity, all you perfection, all your imperfection. Look at you. You are just a shade of my real wife. You're the best I can do; but I'm sorry, you are just not good enough."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Last Action Hero (1993)

Blu-Ray


Review: A fun movie about a boy, Danny, who is a superfan of Schwarzenegger films and is magically transported into Arnold's most recent "Jack Slater" film. The film is a fish-out-of-water tale as Danny has to adapt to a world ruled by action movie logic while Jack Slater faces the harsh realities of physics after chasing the villain back into the real world.

Quotes:
"You were in a movie?"
"Yes. It was called "The Girl of My Dreams". It starred you. As a matter of fact, there was this very romantic scene where we had dinner together."

"I thought I was going to die."
"Well I'm sorry to disappoint you but you're gonna live to enjoy all the glorious fruits life has got to offer - acne, shaving, premature ejaculation... and your first divorce."

"Where are the ordinary, everyday women? They don't exist because this is a movie!"
"No, this is California."

"How'd you know there was a guy in there?"
"There's always a guy in there. It costs me a fortune in closet doors."

"I'll be back! Ha! You didn't know I was gonna say that, did you?"
"That's what you always say!"
"I do?"
"Everyone keeps keeps waiting for you to work it in. It's kind of like your calling card."

"May I help you?"
"Yes, could I speak to the drug dealer of the house, please?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"It's a beautiful day and we're out killing drug dealers. Are there any in the house?"

"I must warn you, I've killed people smarter and younger than you."

"My hand. It really hurts."
"Things work different here. You can't smash a car window with your bare hand and not have it hurt."
"Thanks for sharing. Couldn't you have told me this earlier?"

3 1/2 out of 5 Stars