Film: Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (2003)

Blu-ray


Review: This is a great piece of work and you can tell that it is a made by a master of a director, Peter Weir. I have always liked movies based on the British sailing navy, but have always wanted to see one made with today's technology. The sailing battles are amazing and Russell Crowe was made for this type of role. I think that this is one of the best movie of 2003.

Favorite Scene: The naval battle in the fog.

Quotes:
"Damn, he was good. Just came out of nowhere. Hit us with a full broadside and cut across our tail and took out our rudder. Damn fine gunnery. We only slipped away because of the fog. Quite fortunate, really. He may have had the weather gauge, but we had the weather gods."

"The Surprise is not old. No one would call her old. She has a bluff bow, lovely lines. She's a fine seabird: weatherly, stiff and fast... very fast, if she's well handled. No, she's not old. She's in her prime."

"Well done, Gentleman. To wives and to sweethearts."
"To wives and sweethearts!"
"May they never meet."

"What is it with this man? Did I kill a relative of his in battle, perhaps? His boy, God forbid?"
"He fights like you, Jack."

"Timing?"
"Two minutes and one second, sir."
"Lads, that's not good enough. We need to fire two broadsides to her one. You wanna see a guillotine in Picadilly?"
"NO!"
"Do you want to call that raggedy-ass Napoleon your king?"
"NO!"
"You want your children to sing 'La Marseillaise'?"
"NO!"
"Mr. Mowett, Mr. Pullings, starboard battery! Jump to it, lads. Cadence and rhythm."

"We shall head home before peace breaks out with France, God forbid."
"Jack, I fear you may have burdened me with a debt I can never fully repay."
"Tosh. Name a shrub after me. Something prickly and hard to eradicate."
"A shrub? Nonsense. I'll name a great tortoise after you. Testudo Aubreii."

"England is under threat of invasion. And though we be on the far side of the world, this ship is our home. This ship IS England."

5 out of 5 Stars

Film: Watchmen (2009)

Blu-ray


Review: This film takes place in 1985 on the eve of nuclear war as a masked vigilante, Rorschach, investigates the death of The Comedian, a former teammate from the disbanded Watchmen crime-fighting group. The opening credits sequence of moving photographs beautifully sets up the back-story of the Watchmen & the alternate history of the USA populated by superheros and villains. This film improved for me upon a second viewing. While I appreciated the craft and the storytelling the first time, I had missed a lot of the details because I had never read the original comic.

Quotes:
"Is this bean juice?"
"Human bean juice. Badge belonged to The Comedian. Blood too. He's dead."

"Meeting with Dreiberg left bad taste in mouth. A flabby failure who sits whimpering in his basement. Why are so few of us left active, healthy and without personality disorders? The first Nite Owl runs an auto-repair shop. The first Silk Spectre is a bloated, aging whore dying in a California rest resort. Dollar Bill got his cape stuck in a revolving door where he got gunned down. Silhouette, murdered, a victim of her own indecent lifestyle. Mothman's in an asylum in Maine. Even Adrian Veidt, possible homosexual. Must investigate further."

"Do you remember that crazy guy? What did he call himself... Captain Carnage. The one who used to pretend he was a supervillain just so he could get beaten up all the time?"
"Yeah, he tried that on me once. I just walked away. He starts following me down the street in broad daylight, yelling 'Punish me! Punish me!' I'm just saying 'No! Get lost.'"
"God. Whatever happened to him?"
"Well, he pulled that on Rorschach, and Rorschach dropped him down an elevator shaft."

"It's a joke. It's all a fucking joke. You know, I thought I knew how it was. I thought I knew how the world was. I've done some bad things. I did bad things to women. I shot kids. In 'Nam, you know. But that was fucking WAR! This... I never done anything like this. God, here I am... spilling my guts to one of my archenemies. But the truth is, you're the closest thing to a friend I got. What the fuck does that say? Shit!"

"Maybe we should get a cab. These are bad neighborhoods."
"Yeah, well, I'm in a bad mood."

"None of you seem to understand. I'm not locked in here with you. You're locked in here with ME!"

"Dan? Is everything alright?"
"God I'm tired of being afraid, afraid of war, afraid of the mask-killer... and afraid of this goddamn suit, and how much I need it."
"Me too. So to hell with it; let's take Archi out."
"You're serious."
"I used to be a masked avenger too, you know; I'm used to getting up at 3 in the morning and doing something stupid."

"John, please. You have to stop this. Everyone will die!"
"And the universe will not even notice. In my opinion, the existence of life is a highly overrated phenomenon. Just look around you. Mars gets along perfectly well without so much as a microorganism."

"So in order to save this planet... I had to trick it with the the greatest practical joke in human history."
"Killing millions!"
"To save billions. A necessary crime."
"You know we can't let you do that."
"'Do that', Rorschach? I'm not a comic book villain. Do you seriously think I'd explain my masterstroke to you if there was even the slightest possibility you could effect the outcome. I triggered it 35 minutes ago."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Superman (1978)

Blu-Ray


Review: Superman's first long introduction sequence (set to John Williams' score) that starts with him saving Lois from the crashed helicopter and ends with him rescuing a cat in a tree is perfect cinema magic. Christopher Reeve was born to play Superman/Clark Kent and there is an earnestness to his acting style that allows me to suspend disbelief when he is tunneling under the earth to stop an earthquake or reversing the rotation of the Earth to go back in time. Except for some slow parts in the beginning setting up the story, this is an amazing film.

Quotes:
"If he remains here with us, he will die surely as we will."
"But why Earth, Jar-El? They're primitives thousands of years behind us."
"He will need that advantage to survive. Their atmosphere will sustain him."
"He will defy their gravity."
"He will look like one of them."
"He won't be one of them."
"No. His dense molecular structure will make him strong."
"He'll be odd. Different."
"He'll be fast. Virtually invulnerable."
"Isolated... alone."
"He will not be alone. He will never be alone."

"What are you writing, Miss Lane?"
"An Ode to Spring. How do you spell massacre?"
"Uh. M-A-S-S-A-C-R-E."
"Thank you."
"Golly, Miss Lane, how come you got all the great stories?"
"A good reporter doesn't get great stories, Jimmy. A good reporter makes them great."

"Look Lois, Clark Kent may seem like just a mild-mannered reporter, but listen... not only does he know how to treat his editor-in-chief with the proper respect... not only does he have a snappy, punchy prose style... but he is in my 40 years in this business, the fastest typist I've ever seen."

"Easy, miss. I got you."
"You... you've got me? Who's got you?"
"Well, I certainly hope this little incident hasn't put you off flying, miss? Statistically speaking, of course, it's still the safest way to travel."
"Right... Wait! Who are you?"
"A friend. Bye."

"Why are you here? There must be a reason for you to be here."
"Yes, I'm here to fight for truth and justice and the American Way."
"Ha! You're gonna end up fighting every elected official in this country."

"It's open. Come in. My attorney will be in touch with you about the damage to the door. Otis, take the gentleman's cape."
"I don't think he wants me to, Mr. Luthor."

"Now call me foolish, call me irresponsible... it occurs to me that a 500-megaton bomb planted at just the proper point would, uh..."
"Would destroy most of California. Millions of innocent people would die. The West Coast as we know it would..."
"Fall into the sea. Bye, bye California. Hello, new West Cost. My West Coast. Costa del Lex, Lutherville, Marina del Lex, Otisburg... Otisburg?"
"It's just a little-bitty place."
"Otisburg?!"

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Shrek (2001)

Blu-ray


Review: A fun fairy tale that plays off and skewers the established Disney tropes we all know and love. Mike Myers is great as the unlikely hero, Shrek, a grumpy ogre who agrees to rescue a princess for the villainous Lord Farquaad in order to win back control of his swamp. What pushes the movie into greatness is Eddie Murphy's voice work as Donkey, the jabber-mouthed animal who latches onto Shrek as his unwelcome sidekick after the ogre saves him.

Quotes:
"Next. What have you got?"
"This little wooden puppet."
"I'm not a puppet, I'm a real boy!"
"Five shillings for the possessed toy. Take it away."
"Father, please! Don't let them do this!"

"I guess you don't entertain much, do you?"
"I like my privacy."
"Y'know, me too. That's another thing we have in common. Like, I hate it when you've got somebody in your face. You're trying to give them a hint and they won't leave. Then there's that big awkward silence............................ Can I stay with you?"

"We can stay up late, swapping manly stories, and in the morning, I'm making waffles!"

"You! You're coming with me."
"All right, that's what I like to hear, man. Shrek and Donkey, two stalwart friends off on a whirlwind, big-city adventure. I love it! On the road again... Sing it with me, Shrek!"
"What did I say about singing?"
"Well, can I whistle?"
"No."
"Can I hum it?"
"All right, hum it."

"The champion shall have the honour, no, no, the privilege to go forth and rescue the lovely Princess Fiona from the fiery keep of the dragon! If for any reason, the winner is unsuccessful, the first runner-up will take his place, and so on and so forth. Some of you may die, but it's a sacrifice I am willing to make. Let the tournament begin!"

"Phew! Shrek! Did you do that? Man, you gotta warn somebody before you just crack one off. My mouth was open and everything!"
"Believe me, Donkey, if it was me, you'd be dead! It's brimstone... we must be getting close."
"Yeah, right, brimstone. Don't be talking about no brimstone. I know what I smelled, it wasn't no brimstone and it didn't come off no stone neither..."

"So where is this fire-breathin' pain in the neck, anyway?"
"Inside, waiting for us to rescue her."
"I was talkin' about the dragon, Shrek."

"All right, I hope you heard that. She called me a 'noble steed'. She thinks I'm a steed."

"I just know before this is over, I'm gonna need a whole lot of serious therapy. Look at my eye twitchin'."

"Say, Shrek, what're we gonna do with our swamp?"
"We? Donkey, there's no WE. There's no OUR. There's just ME and MY swamp! The first thing I'm gonna do is build a ten-foot wall around my land."
"You cut me deep, Shrek. You cut me real deep just now."

4 1/2 out of 5 Stars

Film: Aspen Extreme (1993)

Blu-Ray


Review: This movie is a surprisingly effective drama about two close friends who move to Aspen to become ski instructors. T.J. has the looks and everything seems to come easy for him, but he struggles to find a deeper purpose in his life. His friend Dexter, trying to keep up with T.J.'s success, falls into drinking and drugs which causes a rift between them. There is a lot of great skiing footage and views of the surrounding mountains and valleys.

SPOILER: I have one huge nitpick with this movie. They should not have tied the extreme skiing portion of the movie to the Powder 8 competition that T.J. and Dexter want to win. The Powder 8 is a precision team event where two competitors ski back and forth in tandem to create perfect figure-eights on a wide and evenly sloped course, but the script always has them extreme skiing off-piste as their only training method. It's the equivalent of playing hockey to train for a figure skating event.

The plot hole is compounded by T.J. winning the competition by skiing off-course with his partner, essentially cheating as they impress the crowd with extreme skiing and jump tricks that have nothing to do with the actual skills the event is judged on. If this had been a slap-stick ski comedy, I might have bought this craziness but it clashes with the real and dramatic tone of the rest of the movie.

Quotes:
"Where are you guys from?"
"Detroit."
"Out here to see if you can be ski instructors, huh?"
"Yeah."
"Ah, about a hundred of you guys show up every year for that. The locals call that the freshman class. You read about movie stars in ski magazines and you want to move here."
"Yeah, I mean, that's all part of it, right?"
"Hope you guys are good."

"I think you're making a real mistake in not hiring, Dexter, I mean he'd make a great ski instructor."
"How would you know? You have only been a ski instructor for 15 minutes."
"Well, I just know. He's a great guy."
"Our clients pay $400 a day for private lessons. For that they expect ski instructors to be a certain type and look... like you. Part of the job is fulfilling a fantasy and you are the fantasy. I'm afraid your friend is not. You ski very well."
"So does he."
"Skiing is the easy part."

"You can come pick T.J. up in the morning. He can stay the night here."
"Wait, how about I stay the night and T.J. comes and picks ME up in the morning, huh?"
"How about not."
"He might have a concussion, guys?"
"You got a lot of luck, T.J."
"I know."

"This isn't your swing."
"Nobody was using it."

"I'm gonna go home to Detroit. Put my name on the list of Ford, maybe get your old job. I just don't want to go back empty-handed. I would like to ask you a favor... Well, I want to win the Powder 8 and I want you to be my partner. I want you to ski with me."

"I just came by to tell you I'm very sorry, T.J. I know you loved him a lot... Things happen, T.J., to everyone."
"It didn't happen to me."
"Yeah, it did."
"You know, I was afraid to come out here without him."

4 out of 5 Stars