"Are you wearing a grocery bag?"
"I have misplaced my pants."
Review: "Mountain of Madness" is one of my favorite Mr. Burns' episodes. "You only Move Twice" is another classic episode along with "Bart after Dark". This is the second to last great season with a few below average episodes starting to sneak into the mix along with the great ones.
"When you work the door, the main things are to greet the visitors and toss out the troublemakers."
"Ah, the old greet 'n' toss. No problemo."
"What's with the glowing?"
"I'll field that question. A lifetime of working in a nuclear power plant has given me a healthy green glow but left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner."
"How could you do this to someone you love?"
"How could I not? I saw you pouring your heart and soul into this business and getting nowhere. I saw you desperately trying to cram one more salty treat into America's already bloated snack-hole. So I did what I could. I did what any loving husband would do. I reached out to some violent mobsters."
"Teamwork is overrated."
"Waah?"
"Think about it. I mean what TEAM was Babe Ruth on? Who knows? Sharing is a bunch of bull too... and helping others. And what's all this crap I've been hearing about tolerance?"
"Hmmm! Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter."
"If I don't get to the top of the mountain real soon, I could get fired."
"We'll help you. I have a watch with a minute hand."
"Aaah! All right you can come. What time is it?"
"12:80. No, wait, wait. What comes after twelve?"
"One."
"No, after twelve!"
"Naaaah!"
"Okay, search party, before we set out, let's take a moment to humor the children. KIDS, YOUR FATHER IS GOING TO BE JUST FINE. Okay, everybody, put on your corpse handling gloves. We've got two frozen bodies buried somewhere in this mountain."
"Did you hear that, Lisa. Dad is going to be just fine."
"Hi, Mr. Meyers. I've been doing some thinking and I got some ideas to improve the show. I got it right here. One, Poochie needs to be louder, angrier and have access to a time machine. Two, when ever Poochie is not on screen, all the other characters should be asking, 'Where's Poochie?' Three..."
"Great, great, just leave them right there on the floor on your way out."
"You know me, Marge. I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals FLAMING."
"Oh, Homer, please. Your embarrassing yourself."
"No, I'm not Marge. They're embarrassing me. They're embarrassing America. They've turned the Navy into a floating joke and ruined all our best names, like Bruce and Lance and Julian. Those were the toughest names we had. Now there just...?"
"Queer?"
"Demand? Who are you to demand anything. I run this town. Your just a bunch of low-income nobodies."
"Uh, election in November, election in November."
"What, AGAIN! This stupid country."
"I don't think we are talking about love here. We're talking about S-E-X in front of the C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N."
"Sex Cauldron! I thought they closed that place down."
5 out of 5 Stars
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