"Greetings to Rome's finest. Douglas Wambaugh here to see the Sheriff."
"What do you want Doug?"
"Phil Banks had a bad ticker. They stuck him in a hot metal suit. There's got to be SOMEONE to sue."
"Get out."
Review: This show fluctuates between genius and just-average depending on the episode and the topic this first season. It's at it's best in the police station and in the courtroom, but the show struggles a bit when it concentrates on the family children's problems. The writers are excellent at balancing each side of an issue so the viewer really has to think. Ray Walston is excellent as Judge Bone and I love his interactions with the lawyer, Wambaugh. Tom Skerrit and Kathy Baker as great as well as the Town Sheriff and Doctor.
"It occurred to me how you and I don't talk like we used to. You know, why don't you sit here on my lap for a second like the old days. Come on."
"You called me down here to sit on your lap?"
"Get over here. Come on. Nothing's wrong. I just want to talk... You remember when you were little, and you'd sit on my lap and we'd talk about the clouds and how giraffes got long necks? Honey, are you sexually active?"
"The truth is, he probably would be a good administrator. More effective than you or me. I just have this feeling with Wambaugh the town would be a hell of a lot more efficient, but the people not quite so proud to live here."
"Kenny, you and I aren't bad-looking people. When you're having sex and there's nobody else there, do you ever think of me?"
"Do you ever think about me?"
"Maybe. A couple of times. When you were thinner. What about you? With me?"
"Once."
"Just once?"
"I don't commit"
"How was I?
"We're senior citizens, Miriam. All we're supposed to do is eat, sleep and watch TV together. We're not expected to notice one another."
"Oh, don't try to second-guess yourself, Jimmy. Everybody agrees with what you've said and done."
"Well, that either makes me more right or just more dangerous."
"Okay, Ginny, help me slide over to my desk."
"Why?"
"Because I've got a hostage-negotiation handbook right by my phone."
"Why didn't you read it before?"
"The warrantless search was unconstitutional, and everything that came after it, including the confession, is poisonous fruits and inadmissible. The case against Mr. Lebeck is dismissed without prejudice."
"How can you put him back on the street?"
"I'm following the law. What YOU did puts him back on the streets."
"Release him. Stealing a duck is a misdemeanor. You can't lock him up for that."
"He didn't just steal it. He chopped its head off and drained its blood. What do you call that?"
"If it was a turkey, I'd call it Thanksgiving."
"This is a Satanic cult, Jimmy. We have to shut them down."
"Your Honor, may I say that the people here are deeply moved and touched by your first ruling. I hope you don't blow it with the next one."
"The next one, Mr. Wambaugh, will be to hold you in contempt if you don't shut up."
4 out of 5 Stars
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